The Hong Family Blog

The Teddy Bear Suite

2011-12-23T22:24:00.001-08:00

Entrance to the Teddy Bear Suite

After our Santa photos, I felt brave enough to attempt another outing with 3 kids. I've decided not to drag Shon to an event he is not likely to enjoy, so it fell to my nanny Irina to accompany me to the Teddy Bear Suite at the Fairmont Olympic Hotel. I took Gerritt & Sophia there last year & couldn't bear to miss it this Christmas season.

Mommy & Jacob

A bear hug

Jacob & the bears

It was a stressful afternoon. We got a late morning start. It took us a while to find parking (it's downtown after all). Then we had to wait in a long line to get inside the Suite. It was way past kids' nap time & they were feeling grouchy. Gerritt became a social butterfly & chatted up with an older gentleman who was also waiting in line. Sophia went into hiding behind my legs & then the stroller.

Sophia is getting tired...

...and really needs a nap here!

When it was almost our turn to go into the Suite both of the kids decided to take off their shoes so Irina & I had to put them back on & convince the kids not to take them off for the rest of the visit. Jacob got hungry & I fed him his bottle while holding him midway in the air.

The kids and I

I couldn't make the kids both smile at me, no matter now hard I tried

Somehow we managed to snap a few decent photos with Sophia & Jacob crying & Gerritt refusing to sit still. I was sure glad to have my nanny there, but even with her helping I came home exhausted. At least I look happy in the photos. I doubt I'll remember how tired I was when I review them in a few years. :-)

A few last photos before leaving...

Sophia in a slightly happier mood after receiving a candy cane

Even though it was a lot of work, my nanny & I thoroughly enjoyed visiting the Teddy Bear Suite. What a way to get into the Christmas spirit! I was pleasantly surprised to find the Suite's decor to be different from the one last year.

Sophia & her nanny Irina

Since we made it to the Suite with a newborn this year, I am pretty sure we'll be again next year. Only Jacob will be 1 year old!

Santa Photos

2011-12-22T21:21:00.000-08:00

We took the kids for their annual Santa photos today. It was a lot of rushing around, picking out the right outfits, getting the kids dressed, making sure they were fed & used the potty prior to leaving & then getting everyone into the car. It was our first outing with all of the 3 kids. Although it was a lot of work (I am still not fully recovered from Jacob's birth), it felt like an adventure.

The attempt #1

The Santa tent was outside & we had to wait in line for over half-an-hour. Even though the evening was chilly, thankfully, there were warming lamps everywhere. Of course, it couldn't be a ride without any bumps. Jacob pooped & there was a mad rush for us to find a restroom. Thankfully, we were able to find one nearby & change his diaper quickly. Many people standing with us in line seemed to understand how young Jacob was & gave us many compliments & sympathetic smiles. :-)

The attempt #2

All enjoyed meeting Santa except Sophia. No amount of preparation could convince her that Santa was a good guy. She used the full volume of her voice to let everyone know how unhappy she was. Santa appeared pretty nervous about sitting all of the 3 children on his lap, so Shon & I had to step into the photo. While Daddy didn't have much luck keeping Sophia on his lap, I did a better job by promising her - what else? - a lollipop!

Our final attempt & probably the best photo we are going to get this year

We went home exhausted, but satisfied. Our first outing with 3 kids was not perfect, but we pulled it off. We would be able to tell Jacob that he met Santa for the first time when he was just 3 weeks & 2 days old. Way to go!

My Postpartum Diary - The Third Week

2011-12-20T15:27:00.001-08:00

Jacob absolutely refuses the pacifier, but loves to suck on my pinky

Day 15 (December 14th, Wednesday)

Last night was my most difficult night. Jacob absolutely refused to be put down. It was never ending cycle of feeding him, watching him fall asleep, then have him wake up the minute I laid him down in the bassinet or on my bed. My breasts were hurting due to bilateral plugged ducts & I knew I needed to pump more frequently to resolve them faster. Pretty challenging to do with a baby who doesn't want to leave my arms! Plus Shon got a really bad cold so he went to bed early & couldn't help much. Jacob cried even louder in a swing (this contraption is turning out to be useless). So I found the solution by putting Jacob next to me while pumping & giving him my pinky to suck on (he absolutely refused a pacifier when I tried) while holding the breast pump attachments with one hand. There were several more rounds of feeding Jacob & him pooping twice in between. I planned to go to bed at 10 pm, however, didn't hit the pillow until 3 am. :-( Needless to say I am cranky & exhausted today.
I stayed in bed for most of the day since rest is required in order for the plugged ducts to resolve & not progress to mastitis. I also followed the rigorous breast engorgement protocol I did on my 2nd post-partum day with the exception of 5" heat application to both breasts prior to pumping. Then I used cold raw cabbage leaves & ice for 20" in between pumping sessions. I also increased my fluid intake to 3 L of water per day. Plugged ducts occur when milk gets "stuck" in one or more parts of a breast. I was in so much pain, I started to think about giving up breastfeeding all together. Especially after Shon asked me if it was worth it. I have a history of recurrent plugged ducts probably due to my inability to succeed at breastfeeding (I've always only pumped, & the pump is not as efficient at removing milk from the breasts compared to a baby). It's pretty frustrating to pump only to have very little milk come out.
I called the lactation specialist & made another house visit appointment for next Monday. Jacob will almost be 3 weeks old by then & I feel like the consultation session would be a lot more useful this time.
Thankfully, the plugged duct in my left breast resolved by the evening time. The milk all of a sudden started to pour out allowing me to drain 3 oz of milk at once (I usually only pump 2-3 oz from both breasts every 3 hours). My right breast is still red, hard & swollen. More icing tonight!

Day 16 (December 15th, Thursday)

I let Jacob cry for about 15" last evening. He started doing the same thing he did the evening prior, refusing to be put down. I didn't want to stay up until 3 am again, so I let him cry while I brushed & flossed my teeth, changed into my pajamas, washed the breast pump parts & otherwise got ready for bed. It was heartbreaking to hear him cry, but I had physical needs that needed to be taken care of. He promptly calmed down & fell asleep when I put him into bed next to me & gave him my pinky to suck on.
My last syringe I usually use for finger feeding Jacob broke today. I called the lactation hotline in panic asking where I could buy some more. Thankfully, I was able to find a breastfeeding supply store not too far from me. I got "lucky" because Shon was at home sick today so he went to the store & bought a couple of infant feeding kits (each kit includes a cup, a syringe & a feeding tube). The lactation specialist also advised I buy Medela Starter SNS (supplemental nursing system) which allows attachment of the tube at the breast while having a bottle of milk hang on your shoulder with milk slowly dripping down rather than pushing a syringe plunger with your finger. So Shon got this kit too. I should be all ready for my lactation specialist visit on Monday.
The plugged ducts in my right breast resolved today. My milk output on that side has decreased by about 40%. Hopefully, I can get it back up soon. I haven't drank my Prolactation tea for the past 2 days waiting for the plugged ducts to resolve. I probably need to restart the tea again, but I am nervous about having a recurrence. I did some research on trusted KellyMom & found out that dietary supplement lecitin can prevent plugged duct recurrence by acting as emulsifier & thinning out the fat making it easier to pass through the ducts. I ordered lecitin online right away. I've also decided to pump for 15-20" instead of 10" per session. I probably wasn't emptying my breasts enough. What a pain! All this could be solved if Jacob breastfed exclusively.

Our Christmas tree

Shon surprised us today be getting a Christmas tree. Always the deal scout, he found a beautiful tall Noble Fur tree for only $7! With all the stress we've had lately, it's so fun to have something festive in the house. The kids & I are looking forward to decorating the tree tomorrow.
I received a letter from my clinic about being laid off, just as I expected, since I passed on a full-time position last week. I am slightly relieved since I now have an excuse to take a job break for 6-12 months (with the exception of my once a week per diem hospital nursing job) to spend more time with Jacob & my other 2 children prior to looking for a new Nurse Practitioner job. Plus it's easier to focus on breastfeeding when I don't have to work 4 days a week.
I had another massage & chiropractic treatment today. What a night & day difference compared to 2 weeks ago! I remember being in so much discomfort then, I moved very slowly & almost cried during the adjustments.

Day 17 (December 16th, Friday)

A small miracle happened last night. Jacob slept from 12:30 am until 6:30 am! He didn't even wake me up in the morning. I woke up feeling unusually well rested. When I looked at the clock, I couldn't believe it was 6:30 am. The first thing I thought was, "He must be starving!" Jacob continued sleeping through my 30" pumping session. My breasts were overflowing with milk & felt very uncomfortable. I pumped a record 5 oz at once! I then woke Jacob up by changing his diaper. He continued sleeping for the rest of the day (with the exception of waking up briefly to eat every 3 hours). He was awake for about 30" in the afternoon & that was it. This is so refreshing after 2 days of barely having any time to myself because Jacob refused to be put down.

Sophia's 1st haircut

The little girl had to be bribed not with one, but two lollipops!

I had a good productive day today. Besides keeping up with my pumping sessions every 2 hours, I took our dog Sammy to the grooming salon in the morning. I also took Sophia for her 1st haircut at noon. She did pretty well after I bribed her with 2 lollipops (her favorite dessert) I brought along with me. She only cried when the hairdresser blow dried her hair (I would too if I've never used a blow dryer before). Sophia got a necklace & My First Haircut card with a few locks of her hair. She was very proud of herself after all was finished.
I took a walk outside today. It was a beautiful warm day, so my toy poodle Maxi & I walked for about 20" (my first walk outside for the past 2 months). I did ok with the exception of my achy pubic area.

My two adorable assistants

Our Christmas tree all decorated

The biggest accomplishment was decorating our Christmas tree. The kids helped in the beginning & then I asked Shon to play with them so I could finish decorating the tree all by myself. I am very protective of the fragile Christmas ornaments so the fewer hands are handling them the better. Decorating took the last ounce of energy I had for the day, but it made me & the kids happy to have a beautiful fragrant Christmas tree in the house.

Gerritt giving Sophia a piggyback ride

I didn't make any attempts to latch Jacob on the breast today probably because I enjoyed having him sleep for most of the day. It was nice to get out of the house & do "normal" things. Exlusive breastfeeding would be a full-time job. Sometimes I am very tempted to try a bottle so someone else can take over the feedings. Perhaps in a few weeks...

Days 18 & 19 (December 17th & 18th, Saturday & Sunday)

Our toy poodle Maxi can be easily mistaken for one of the stuffed toys

With our nanny being off this weekend, all hell broke loose. Both Sophia & Gerritt refused to eat what was served at breakfast & lunch & then took over 2 hours to fall asleep for naps & at bedtime. Lots of crying, screaming, temper tantrums & frustration. With me pumping & finger feeding Jacob around the clock, most of the previously done by me childcare tasks were transferred to Shon. He doesn't tend to negotiate & doesn't have the same degree of patience that I do, so the kids rebelled. The whole family is going through a major adjustment phase. It seems that all we do is yelling & reprimanding the kids. :-(

Our cutie pie in one of his rare awake moments

Bedtime is the most difficult. Both Gerritt & Sophia have to sleep with Daddy. Gerritt tends to fall asleep quickly whereas Sophia tends to sing, count & talk loudly for up to 2 hours. She keeps Gerritt awake, so he's been more irritable from the lack of sleep since Jacob's birth. Several times I walked into Shon's bedroom only to find him fast asleep & snoring while the kids were still up laughing & playing.
I really miss taking care of Sophia & Gerritt. Jacob requires most of my attention & energy now & I catch myself going for days without hugging or kissing Gerritt & Sophia. I can't remember the last time Gerritt & I read books. We snuggled on the rocking chair one evening & dreamt about Shon watching Jacob at night so Gerritt & I could read books at bedtime like we used to. Bottlefeeding sounds very tempting.
I spent most of Sunday in pain due to plugged ducts in both of my breasts again. More Ibuprofen, breast massage, cold cabbage leaves, warm packs & pumping. I was feeling really irritated at not being able to remove much milk from my breasts & relieve the pain with all of my interventions. Also I couldn't hug anyone or even sleep on my side. Gerritt simply brushing against my chest would almost cause me to be in tears. Burping Jacob by laying him on my shoulder was very uncomfortable too.
On Sunday Jacob smiled for the first time! He didn't do it in his sleep or while daydreaming, but intentionally, while looking at me. I have to see if he does it again tomorrow, just to make sure I am not mistaken. My old midwife told me that babies would smile a lot sooner than the expected 6 weeks if more people smiled at them right from the beginning.

Day 20 (December 19th, Monday)

Gerritt slept with Jacob & me last night. He just decided he wanted to sleep next to me even with baby waking up & crying several times at night (he said he "didn't care"). Jacob was reasonably quiet & I took him out to the hallway for his diaper changes in the bassinet since he sometimes cries during those. Then he usually cries while waiting for his milk to warm up. I did the feeding & burping in bed. Thankfully, Jacob promptly fell asleep after each feeding & never woke up Gerritt. We didn't fall asleep until 11:30 pm, so all of us slept in until 10:30 am today. Everyone's regular schedules are definitely off.
I was so exhausted last evening, I fed Jacob with a bottle during the night time. I just didn't have the energy to do the finger feeding routine anymore. Every time Jacob wakes up, it takes me 1 hour to finish everything before I can fall asleep again. I have to change Jacob's diaper, finger feed him, then pump, record the pumped milk amount on a log, then wash all of the pump parts, hydrate myself & use the restroom. I also often check on Sophia prior to returning to my bed to make sure she is covered with her blanket & is not getting cold. Sometimes I also refill the humidifier with water so we don't wake up with dry stuffy noses. The list of things to do can get surprisingly long for the middle of the night.

The starter kit SNS

We had another home visit with a lactation specialist today (a different one this time). She taught me how to breastfeed Jacob using the nipple shield & the starter kit supplemental nursing system (SNS). The goals are to breastfeed Jacob with a nipple shield & SNS, then with a nipple shield alone, then directly at the breast. With two of us helping, Jacob latched using the nipple shield & suckled for the longest time ever thanks to the SNS squirting some milk into his mouth to keep him interested.

Best buddies

After the lactation specialist left, I tried to breastfeed Jacob using the nipple shield & SNS twice. It was a disaster! I couldn't get comfortable with the pillows; the nipple shield kept sliding off with baby's arms constantly trying to grab my breast; the SNS bottle was the wrong size & kept leaking all over me & the baby, & the milk flow from the SNS was too fast. Since the SNS bottle was too big, it couldn't be clipped to my clothes & I had to hold it with my neck causing it to cramp. I really needed another person to help me with the equipment, but Shon was gone to run a few much needed errands. So I ended up feeling frustrated & in tears again.

Sophia insisted on using the potty with all of her stuffed animals

On a good note, Sophia went pee on a potty twice today. I checked her diaper twice & since it was dry I encouraged her to sit on a potty while watching TV. Success! I showed her the pee, but it didn't seem to impress her much. I praised her regardless. Hopefully, this is the start of her potty training.

Day 21 (December 20th, Tuesday)

Jacob is 3 weeks old today! I feel I am just starting to get out of the post-partum "fog." It is not even hormonal or physical, but due to chronic sleep deprivation. I find myself slurring speech, having trouble making decisions & focusing. Since I am not practicing breastfeeding at night, Shon was able to take over at 4 am today & feed Jacob via bottle allowing me some uninterrupted sleep. I barely woke up in time for my dental appointment at 9 am today. Here I was at my dentist's office apologizing for stains on my clothes & somewhat unkept appearance. I almost fell asleep during my tooth cleaning. I have post-partum gingivitis again so there was some gum bleeding. Unfortunately, I also need to have a crown & a filling replaced. This has less to do with pregnancy & breastfeeding & more with poor dental habits in childhood. Thankfully, even with me being laid off from my clinic job, I have dental insurance coverage through January 31st. I also have another dental insurance through Shon's work, so our out-of-pocket expenses will be minimal.

I had to photograph Shon's swaddling attempt :-)

Gerritt slept with Jacob & me again last night. I held sleeping Jacob in my arms while I read books to Gerritt. It looks like we found a way to get back to our old routine! Gerritt's favorite books now are Knuffle Bunny by Mo Willems, Hickory Dickory Dock by Keith Baker & One Is a Feast For Mouse - A Thanksgiving Tale by Judy Cox. He's also in love with Justin Bieber! I've rented his DVD Never Say Never, & Gerritt now wants to watch it every night.
I took my 2nd since birth walk today with Maxi & Sammy. I still have mild ache in my pelvis (mostly pubis). I've developed constipation for the past 3 days despite drinking lots of water & maintaining a reasonably good diet. It's probably due to not getting any exercise & Ibuprofen I've been taking to relieve pain from the plugged ducts. Another hurdle to overcome.
This is our nanny's last week working for us. She's been with us for more than 1.5 years & helped to raise Gerritt & Sophia. Part of me is excited for my Mom moving to the US to live with us, but another part of me is sad for Irina leaving. This week I had Irina work from 8 am until 1 pm (kids' nap time), only because Shon is on his paternity leave for the next 2 weeks (or until my Mom arrives). I don't feel ready yet in any shape or form to take care of 3 kids by myself.
I am feeling more optimistic today. Rather than giving up breastfeeding completely, I am thinking of exclusive pumping to provide Jacob with benefits of breastmilk. Besides KellyMom, I found another good resource for women who pump exclusively - Got Breast Pump! Just when you think you've mastered all of the baby-related stuff, there is a new area to explore!

My Postpartum Diary - The Second Week

2011-12-14T18:14:00.001-08:00

Day 8 (Wednesday, December 7th)

Jacob's first ride in a car seat

Today was a day of firsts. Jacob had his first real bath. He cried at first, but then quieted down, so I am assuming he enjoyed it. Jacob & I also left the house together for the 1st time to see my midwife for our 1-week check up. The outing was so refreshing! Gerritt told me yesterday he was sad I "didn't take him anywhere anymore." Poor thing! He doesn't have the life experience to understand that the newborn stage is temporary & started to get some of my "cabin fever." I took pity on him & allowed him to skip his nap in order to join me & Jacob at our appointment.

Jacob's 1 week check-up at my midwife's office

He truly enjoyed it since Charlene gave him chocolates, praised him for being a big brother & showed him a couple of interesting games. Jacob got weighed (he was 8 lbs 2 oz) while I got my blood pressure & temperature checked. We also practiced latching Jacob on my breast using the supplemental nursing system (a tube & a syringe) to help make him more interested in breastfeeding.

More flowers for Jacob & I

Today was the first day I felt more like my normal self in a physical sense. Although I miss all of Jacob's little kicks & punches, I am glad to be getting my body back. I am really looking forward to exercising again. I've been missing the walks with our dogs Sammie & Maxi since I haven't exercised much during the last month of pregnancy.
Being cooped up in our house for so many days in a row with the furnace on I developed dry skin, chapped lips & dry bloody nose. I started boiling water on the stove & then after almost ruining my pots when water evaporated completely, I remembered I had a humidifier. Now I run it all day long. My skin is thanking me already.
I got so tired of getting cold when getting up in the middle of the night, I've decided to just sleep in my fleece pants & jacket. This way I don't freeze while waiting for my pumping session to finish. Plus I will be able to touch Jacob with warm hands which is a good thing.

Day 10 (Friday, December 9th)

My Prolactation tea

I got a nice routine going. When Jacob wakes me up in the morning, I change his diaper, then finger feed him & pump. Then I go to the kitchen & make my Prolactation tea as well as raspberry leaf/nettle leaf/oatstraw/alfalfa tea. I then have breakfast & take my supplements (making sure not to forget the most important one - my placenta capsules). I try to fit in a shower sometime in the morning. Taking care of Jacob & myself are priorities now since I need to get good nutrition & continue with the supplements to produce enough milk.
It was a sunny beautiful day today. I wanted to take the dogs walking, but then I layed down on the bed to rest for a few minutes after pumping & dozed off. I woke up about 30" later realizing I was still too tired & weak to tolerate our usual 25-30-minute walk outside. It's something to look forward to though!
I had another chiropractor appointment this morning. I am finally able to lay on my abdomen. My full of milk breasts were a bit uncomfortable to lay on, but the adjustment on my back felt so good!
Things are slowly getting back to normal. While Gerritt was gone to a movie (Cars-2) with our neighbor Rinku, I gave Sophia a bath. It's been a week since her last one (she absolutely refuses for our nanny to bathe her). I then decided to take a bath with Jacob. It seemed like a good idea to have him lay on my lap & on my chest for a nice skin-to-skin contact, but he screamed the whole time. He was so scared, he was shaking & turned all red from crying. Poor baby! He kept making a sad face & whimpering in the fretful sleep that followed the bath.
The HR person called me from my clinic. No part-time jobs were available, so they offered me a full-time spot in Bellevue. Of course, I turned it down. There is no way I can work full-time with 3 kids under the age of 5. I am expecting to be laid off soon, which is OK with me.

Rented Medela Symphony breast pump - my constant companion

After more than a week of pumping in the living room, I've made a smart decision to move my pumping station to my bedroom for the night time. This way, when Jacob wakes up I'll change his diaper, finger feed him, then pump while sitting on my bed. After washing the pump parts in the bathroom, I can go back to sleep.
We've also decided to get the baby bassinet out. It's the same one we used for Gerritt & Sophia. We always used to put Jacob on the couch or a rocking chair but it's nice to have a safe & comfortable place especially for him. The bassinet has wheels so I am able to move it next to my bed for the night time.
Shon bought a swing today off the Craig's list ad. We didn't think we needed one, but decided it was necessary after all. Sometimes Jacob cries in the middle of my pumping session. I can't really pick him up since I have to pump for at least 10" straight, so I am hoping to put him in a swing to keep him quiet while I pump.

Day 11 (Saturday, December 10th)

Finger feeding breastmilk using the SNS system

Good news! I pumped 5 oz of breastmilk (the most ever at one time) after sleeping from 3:30 am to 8 am (4.5 hours). It is good to know my breasts are capable of holding that much milk at once. I am keeping track of my pumping schedule & the amount of milk I produce to see whether I can increase my milk production while drinking the Prolactation Tea 3 times a day.
I am proud of myself for keeping up the pumping schedule this far, but it's getting tiring to do the double amount of work (pumping, then feeding Jacob, plus all the pump part washing/sterilizing). I definitely don't put Jacob on my breast enough. I am supposed to do it at every feeding, but it's easier in a way to just finger feed him so he can continue sleeping rather than unwrap his blankets, wake him up & then have him fuss at the breast.

Jacob with his big brother Gerritt

I tried the tube at the breast a couple of days ago & even with me squirting milk into his mouth, Jacob didn't get into a good sucking pattern. He usually sucks once or twice, then lets go & cries. Sometimes I pump right before Jacob wakes up so I feel I shouldn't put him to my breast if it's empty.
With almost 2 weeks of around-the-clock pumping my usually flat nipples have become softer & easier to grasp. The plan now is to help Jacob associate breast with positive emotions, so I need to snuggle him at my breast even if no sucking occurs. Of course, I myself need to work on staying calm & relaxed. I am trying to visualize Jacob breastfeeding peacefully. I remind myself that latching is the last step in initiating our breastfeeding relationship. I have everything else already in place - an almost recovered after birth mother, breasts full of milk, softer/more pliable nipples & my commitment to breastfeeding. I almost wish I had a lactation consultant at my house for 24 hours, with her encouraging me at each feeding ("You can do it!") & making sure I give it a good try. I am debating whether I want to spend another $150 for an additional home visit. If my latching attempts don't work - probably. I've always regretted not trying harder when attempting to breastfeed my other children.

Day 12 (December 11th, Sunday)

Shon took the kids to grandma's house for the whole day. What a relief! Jacob & I watched a few movies on Netflix. I've also read a few articles on breastfeeding from KellyMom.
I am still concerned about not producing enough milk for Jacob. Good news! According to one of the articles, I need to aim for pumping 25-27 oz per day by 7-10 days postpartum. 11-17 oz/day is considered borderline & less than 11 oz/day is considered low. So far I've been able to pump 19 oz on day 9, 19.5 oz on day 10, 22.75 oz on day 11 & 22 oz on day 12. I pump 8-9 times per day & don't go longer than 5 hours without pumping at night. Tips for increasing breastmilk output include resting & relaxing as much as possible & having skin-to-skin contact (Kangaroo care) for at least 1 hour daily. It's a big commitment, but Jacob is worth it. I just hope I won't become someone who has to pump exclusively.

I found the following helpful suggestions for baby who won't nurse:

- Work on latching for up to 10" at a time & if baby is getting upset, make the sessions shorter
- If baby is really frustrated, it's a good idea to take a break (let baby suck on a finger, snuggle baby on mother's chest or hand baby to Dad)
- Take the edge off baby's hunger by offering him a little supplement (0.5 oz) at the beginning of a feeding
- Have lots of skin-to-skin contact & offer the breast often
- "Seduce" your baby to the breast, do not force breastfeeding

Jacob & I did some skin-to-skin snuggling today. It's harder to stay warm (it's December after all!) so I have to cover us up quickly. I've read most babies would be able nurse by 4-6 weeks after birth. I am keeping my fingers crossed!

Day 13 (December 12th, Monday)

This early morning I woke up in a wet bed (!). I get so cold getting up in the middle of the night that I made myself a hot water bottle. I must have not put the cap on tightly enough because the bottle leaked all over my pants & bed. Not fun! Together with my hot water bottle I also use an electric heating pad to put over my back when I am pumping at night. If we have a baby again, I will make sure he/she is born in summer time. I am tired of getting cold!

Not much happened today. My days & nights are starting to blend together. The highlight of my day was getting out of the house for a few minutes to take our nanny to the bus stop. I am still too weak to go anywhere for a longer outing, plus I am pumping every 2-3 hours. I am a bit nervous about going for a haircut & highlighting appointment next week. Usually that takes around 3 hours, plus the driving time. However, I need this appointment badly. I've underestimated the speed of my hair growth & with Jacob being 1 week "overdue," my hair is in desperate need of some highlighting & styling.

I can't stop marveling at the perfection of Jacob's toes

Jacob still sleeps for most of the day allowing me ample time to pursue one of my favorite hobbies - blogging. He is starting to "fill out" more & is getting less jaundiced. He loves to stretch & is getting better control of his arms. I've tried to latch him on this morning & he had a few good sucks. I just can't bring myself to do it at every feeding. I would spend the whole day doing just that. Plus, I am afraid to get behind in my pumping schedule & loose my milk supply. I am probably a little obsessed about preserving it.
I've ordered a few books & CDs from the library. I need something entertaining to look forward to. Most of all, I am counting the days until my Mom arrives to live with us from Russia (sometime after Christmas). I will probably return to my per diem hospital nursing job in about 4 weeks (only once a week, however), so she needs to learn as much as possible about the care of her grandchildren.

Day 14 (December 13th, Tuesday) - Jacob is 2 weeks old!

More pumping & finger feeding today. Tried to latch Jacob on only once - too much work. I think the whole house is covered in my breastmilk including bed sheets, recliner chair & my clothes. I stopped wearing the nursing bra. It's more convenient to just wear a cotton shirt & my fleece jacket that opens in the front for easy access.

I gave Jacob his 2nd bath today & he didn't cry this time. My nanny took some photos of Jacob & me. I also experimented with my camera to take a few photos of Jacob with Gerritt & Sophia.

I am starting to feel pretty bored. The same daily routine is getting to me. Thank goodness, Shon watched Sophia & Jacob in the evening while Gerritt & I went grocery shopping at Trader Joe's & then made a trip to the library to pick up a few books & CDs. It's amazing how Christmas singing by Mariah Carey can cheer one up!

I got the dreaded plugged ducts in both breasts today. :( So more cold Booby Tubes, cabbage leaves & frequent pumping. I definitely need to get more rest. Jacob sleeps a lot even though it's in short stretches. I probably do too much internet surfing to get enough sleep. It's just that sleeping feels like a waste of time when there are so many fun things I could be doing.

Shon is insisting I choose a "push present" at Tiffany's even though I told him I didn't need anything. So I am going to check out Tiffany's website tomorrow for some pretty earrings or a necklace. :-)

Placenta Encapsulation

2011-12-12T15:28:00.000-08:00

In addition to having a home birth, I have decided early on if I ever got pregnant again I would encapsulate my placenta. I don't exactly remember how I came upon this idea, but most likely from reading one of my favorite natural birth/parenting blogs. All I knew was that it made sense & I wanted to discover the amazing powers of the placenta for myself.
The post-partum emotional roller coaster is the hardest part of birth recovery for me. I can cry at the "drop of a hat." I can go from feeling deliriously happy to feeling absolutely miserable in a matter of a few hours. My negative attitude can really drive my husband up the wall & make the newborn adjustment period even more difficult for the whole family. Although the post-partum hormonal shifts have been well documented in scientific literature & the resulting mood fluctuations are expected, I sure would not miss an opportunity to prevent or at least lessen them. Of course, after everything I've been through the least my husband can do is to put up with a few miserable weeks & be as patient as he can, but why suffer needlessly when nature's pefect cure is so readily available?

My placenta encapsulated & photographed by Kat Barron (Fagerlie) - my midwife apprentice extraordinaire

What exactly is placenta encapsulation & why would anyone do this? Placenta encapsulation is the process of preparing your baby's placenta (in a capsule form) in order to preserve your own natural hormones & reintroduce them to your system to ease pospartum hormonal fluctuations. Placenta is believed to balance system via a perfect for you hormone combination, replenish depleted iron, give you more energy, lessen postpartum bleeding, increase milk production & help to have a happier postpartum period.

The known ingredients that give the placenta its healing properties include:

- gonadotropin (the precursor to estrogen, progesterone & testosterone)
- prolactin (promotes lactation)
- oxytocin (facilitates bonding of a mother & infant)
- thyroid stimulating hormone (increases energy & helps to recover from stress)
- cortisone (helps to adapt to stress & increase energy)
- interferon (stimulates the immune system)
- prostaglandins (decrease inflammation)
- hemoglobin (reduces anemia)
- urokinase inhibiting factor & factor XIII (stop bleeding & enhance wound healing)
- gammaglobulin (boosts the immune system)

If a woman wants to use the placenta for her postpartum recovery, special consideration must be given to placenta after the birth. Once it's born, the placenta should be handled as though it were food. It should not be left sitting out on the floor or on chux pad, but go into a food-grade container & be refrigerated immediately. The preparation of the placenta should begin within the first 24 hours after birth.

Although the placenta is consumed raw by some women, the placenta encapsulation process (where the placenta is completely dried, ground & placed into capsules) has an advantage of a woman being able to benefit from it for weeks instead of just a few postpartum days. Also, the capsules can be frozen & taken beyond postpartum period in times of stressful transition (e.g., going back to work).
Tomorrow will be 2 weeks since Jacob was born & I am happy to report I haven't experienced a single day of the "baby blues." I feel like myself & was able to adjust to the demanding newborn period with ease. I haven't cried, lost my temper, been overwhelmed or felt depressed. I am so grateful & only wish I've known about placenta encapsulation sooner!

Additional Resources:

1) Placenta Benefits

2) The Amazing Placenta by Sarah Buckley, MD

3) Placentophagy by Mary Field, RGN, SCM from Birthrites (a personal account)

4) IPEN (Independent Placenta Encapsulation Network)

5) Placenta Bakery (the placenta encapsulation specialists)

6) Google Maps List of Independent Placenta Service Providers

7) Birth Wise Holistic Doula Services International Directory

8) Placenta: The Gift of Life book by Cornelia Enning

9) MoonDragon's Parenting Page (placenta use suggestions, rituals & recipes)

10) Home video of the placenta encapsulation process

11) Placenta encapsulation instructions with pictures

12) CTV's Live at 5 Power of Placenta news video presentation

13) Why Placenta Encapsulation? YouTube video by Spirited Doula Birth Services

Jacob is 1 week old today!

2011-12-06T20:23:00.001-08:00

Now a family of 5!

Jacob is a peaceful & quiet baby. He sleeps for most of the time. Even though my sleep is more broken up now, I actually feel more rested since the quality of my sleep is better. No more middle-of-the-night trips to empty my bladder; no more leg cramps; no more waking up in sweat & no more tossing & turning all night while trying to find a comfortable position. Jacob sleeps for 3.5-4-hour stretches at night allowing me plenty of rest. We have been cosleeping from day 1 & I love feeling his warm little body snuggled next to me.

Precious little toes (Jacob is wearing our wedding rings)

As I should have guessed from the last ultrasound (the technician couldn't move Jacob's hands aways from his face as hard as she tried), Jacob loves to have his hands close to his face. He uses them to cover his eyes if the light is too bright. He also sucks his fingers when he is hungry. Sometimes he sucks on them for comfort (we haven't established breastfeeding yet so pacifiers are banned). He often reminds me of a little baby bird when he covers his face with his hands while sleeping. I have re-thought my position on swaddling so Jacob always has his hands accessible. Jacob finds sucking very comforting so sometimes I give him my pinkie to suck on if he is rooting, but I know he's full.

With teddy bear from grandma Chris & grandpa Gerry

Jacob is helpless & seems so tiny to me. He doesn't have many fat reserves yet & gets cold easily. His skin is silky smooth & is starting to peel all over. I love his newborn sent & can't stop kissing his head & face. I really enjoy watching Jacob's many facial expressions while he's sleeping. They change from sad to happy in a matter of seconds. Sometimes he even whimpers & giggles.

On the blanket from my clinic coworkers

Jacob gets startled easily so I've been teaching Gerritt & Sophia to be a little quieter when playing. He finally stopped crying when we change his outfits & diapers (he was absolutely terrified at first). However, bathing will take some more getting used to. Jacob seems to recognize our voices & doesn't seem to be bothered by Maxi & Sammie's barking.

Maxi has absolutely fallen in love with Jacob & hasn't left my side since Jacob was born. He's often the first to be at Jacob's side when he cries. Maxi also sleeps with me & curls up next to me when I get up in the middle of the night to feed Jacob & pump.

Jacob is a precious little peanut. We are so happy he is here & he's ours. We are truly blessed!

My Postpartum Diary - The First Week

2011-12-03T23:42:00.002-08:00

Sophia counting fruit from Jacob's gift basket

Day 0 (Tuesday, November 29th - the day of Jacob's birth)

I was surprised I could sit right after birth comfortably (I couldn't sit after Sophia's birth, my first hospital VBAC, for at least 5 days). Jacob was alert for about 3 hours right after being born. We spent most of the morning trying to latch him onto my breast without much success. He just did a couple of licks, but that was it.
Shon called my pre-arranged lactation specialist & she came to our house that same afternoon. We reviewed correct latching technique, breastfeeding positions, frequency of breastfeeding, etc. She taught me how to hand express colostrum & feed it to Jacob with a spoon. We also spent much of the visit time trying to latch on Jacob. The consultant was nice, but Jacob cried every time she touched him with her cold hands with plastic gloves on. He spent much of the 2.5-hour lactation visit undressed & I was concerned about him getting cold. My rocking chair wasn't a good fit & I couldn't find a comfortable position for breastfeeding no matter how many times I rearranged the pillows.

It probably wasn't a good idea to have a lactation consultation on the day of Jacob's birth. The adrenalin rush & excitement of the morning got the best of me & I had a hard time absorbing the instructions halfway through the visit. I was sleepy, hungry, thirsty & desperately wanted to lie down. I finally told the consultant I needed to rest for the remainder of the session & had Shon fix me a snack. I don't think I heard anything she said in the last hour of her visit. Thankfully, the consultant left me many handouts & even 2 pages of handwritten instructions.
By the night time I was exhausted & wanted to get a good night sleep. My first warm post-birth shower felt great. I couldn't imagine hand expressing colostrum every 2-3 hours & doing the time-consuming spoon feeding, so I ended up giving Jacob some formula from the bottle during the night.
Shon put Gerritt to bed with him & Sophia, however, once Shon was asleep Gerritt snuck out of Shon's bedroom quietly & announced he wanted to sleep with me. I told Gerritt he had to sleep by himself in our king size bed. As a result, I spent my first night post-partum sleeping with Jacob on the couch in our living room. Needless to say, I had an achy back the next morning.

Home post-partum visit with Kat

Sophia checking in on us

My midwife Charlene & Jacob

Day 1 (Wednesday, November 30th)

I felt good enough to do light housekeeping while my nanny took the kids to the park. Not because I had to, but because I just couldn't spend most of the day in bed. I just wanted to feel normal & doing my usual daily activities helped me feel that way.
I am elated not to experience any post-partum urinary incontinence this time. With the exception of slight soreness, everything feels OK in my perineum. I didn't even need to apply ice packs.
My midwife Charlene & her apprentice Kat came over for day 1 post-partum visit. They checked my uterine fundus & blood pressure. I was expriencing pretty uncomfortable "afterpains" (especially when pumping), so Charlene gave me a tincture of cramp bark. Kat checked Jacob & pocked his heel to get blood for metabolic screen. Charlene noticed that the house was very clean & reminded me I should be in "horizontal position" for most of the day.

She spent much time helping me to latch Jacob on. Charlene recommended we get a different rocking chair with cushy supportive arms & a wider seat to have more room for all the pillows. She remembered how important breastfeeding was to me & advised I stop bottle-feeding Jacob if I had any hope of breastfeeding him to avoid the nipple confusion. Charlene sensed my low confidence & even a desire to give up & gave me lots of positive affirmations about my ability to breastfeed. I've decided to finger feed Jacob using a syringe with a tube until he learns to latch on better.

Part of Jacob's umbilical cord preserved by Kat

Kat brought my encapsulated placenta & I took 2 capsules that same evening. She advised I take 4 capsules/day for the next 6 weeks, but to avoid taking all 4 capsules in the evening time since they may give me a burst of energy & make it harder to go to sleep.

My wonderful neighbor Rinku took Gerritt for a play date at her house for a few hours. With my most needy child out of the house, things became very manageable.
I did not want to spend another night on the couch so I've decided to give cosleeping with both Gerritt & Jacob a try. Jacob was surpisingly quiet at night & I was able to feed & change him without waking up Gerritt. Jacob slept next to me & I was able to sense his movements & hear his little squeaks before he fully woke up.

Day 2 (Thursday, December 1st)

I had my first after-birth outing to a chiropractor's office for a much needed adjustment & a massage. The chiropractor was running behind & I almost feel asleep in a chair while waiting for my turn. The adjustment was surprisingly uncomfortable, especially in my pelvis. I could feel it was misaligned. Massage helped to relieve my achy neck & shoulders due to my hunched over posture while attempting to breastfeed. Thankully, Jacob stayed asleep the whole time I was gone, so my nanny didn't have to do any finger feeding.
My flow would increase & cramps came on mostly when I was pumping. I passed 2 large blood clots & then experienced significant relief of my afterpains. I found the maxipads & a peri-bottle to be very useful.
My milk came in by Thursday evening & my breasts became severely engorged. They were swollen, hard & acutely tender. I found a large tender lymph node in my right armpit. My nipples were so flat that I abandoned any idea of trying to latch on Jacob until engorgement resolved. I tried to pump, but no milk came out due to significant edema blocking the milk ejection ducts. My nanny encouraged me to hand express, but I wasn't successful. I was feeling pretty discouraged, but then turned to Google.
Thankfully, I was able to put together a successful breast engorgement treatment plan. It involved 20" cold application right before pumping to decrease edema (I used ice, bags of frozen berries & Earth Mama Angel Baby Booby Tubes); pumping only one breast at a time while massaging it using firm motions from the outer breast quadrants toward the nipple to release the milk; & pumping for short (5-10") & frequent sessions (every 1-3 hours). I also used Ibuprofen to decrease the inflammation & pain. Leaving my warm bed in order to put ice packs on my breasts in the middle of the night is my least pleasant post-partum experience, however, it had to be done because the alternative was worse.
My pubic ache is still present so, just like in pregnancy, I have to get out of bed by turning to my side first & then slowly lowering my legs. Surprisingly, my right ribs continue to be sore as well from all of Jacob kicks while in my belly.
I strongly insisted that Gerritt sleep with Shon & Sophia today. Between my frequent pumping & finger feeding sessions another quiet night was highly unlikely. Gerritt resisted at first, but was able to be bribed by Shon with video games. Jacob slept next to me surprisingly well again with 3.5 to 4-hour stretches between awakenings allowing me plenty of rest.

Day 3 (Friday, December 2nd)

It was my most exhausting & labor intensive day since birth. I spent most of the day applying ice to my breasts, pumping every 2 hours during the day (and about every 4 hours at night), finger feeding Jacob & washing all the pump parts. It was hard to focus on anything but pain & swelling in my breasts. I couldn't hug anyone or even sleep on my side.
I talked to my midwife who suggested I try the application of raw cabbage leaves to relieve engorgement. Shon made a trip to the store to get the cabbage. He also found & picked up a free (!) recliner chair via the Craig's List ad. The recliner turned out to be everything Charlene requested to be used as a comfortable place to nurse. It was large & wide with lots of room for pillows; it had cushy armrests; & it could also rock & recline. Perfect!
I found out today that I may be laid off my Planned Parenthood clinic job. There is staff reduction process going on due to bad economy with preference for people working full time. The staff have to re-bid for job openings all over again based on seniority. I am only willing to work 2 days a week at the most & close to home, which probably means I'll be let go. Strangely, I don't really care. Nothing is more important than our new baby Jacob & my family. Of course, it helps that I have my hospital nursing job to fall back on (which only requires working 1 day a week).
My neighbor Rinku invited Gerritt for another playdate at her house. Shon & I enjoyed a quiet evening with Sophia & Jacob. As the day went on, the pumping produced more milk with each session & I finally started to get some relief of my breast engorgement.
Gerritt made another attempt to return to cosleeping with me by walking out of Shon's bedroom at midnight. After hugs & kisses I sent him back crossing my fingers that our cosleeping separation would get easier with time. I went to bed with the cabbage leaves on.

Day 4 (Saturday, December 3rd)

I spent another day pumping every 2-3 hours & finger feeding Jacob. I took a short nap in the new recliner chair with him on my chest. Thankfully, breast engorgement almost resolved by the evening time & I was able to return to pumping both breasts simultaneously.

The Supplemental Nursing System (SNS) I use to finger feed Jacob

Shon took the kids to his Mom's house in Tacoma to give me a day of rest. All of them returned in the evening & Shon's Mom got to meet Jacob at last. Both kids refused to nap while at grandma's house & so there were many tears & temper tantrums upon their return home. We spent much of the evening trying to put the kids to bed. After being allowed some play time, Gerritt went to bed with Shon & Sophia without any resistance (thank you, Lord!).

Day 5 (Sunday, December 4th)

The liquid gold

I spent more time pumping & finger feeding Jacob. I tried to latch him on a couple of times. He stayed at the breast longer today - 4-5 sucks instead of 1-2 at a time, however, he didn't want to stay for longer than that & I didn't persist to avoid making breastfeeding an unpleasant experience for him. I am dreaming of the day when all I have to do is to breastfeed with no more pumping & finger feeding. Instead of cold from the freezer, I am now using warm Booby Tubes to encourage milk letdown. Every day Jacob gets breastmilk feels like a small victory.
I took another shower & was able to shave my legs for the 1st time since birth. What a relief not to have a large abdomen anymore!

My placenta capsules

I am happy about not having any postpartum blues yet (I've been taking my placenta pills faithfully every day). Supposedly, the baby blues peak between days 3-5 after delivery. I think my husband is surprised I haven't yelled at him, cried, or acted depressed. I feel nothing but love & gratitude for him & all-consuming desire to protect Jacob. Of course, I am so much in love with him too! I am able to keep up with the exhausting schedule of pumping & then finger feeding Jacob around the clock. I even have enough energy to do light housework.
My midwife's apprentice Kat came over for 2nd post-partum visit. She checked my fundus, temperature & blood pressure. Jacob also got a thorough check-up too. He had some physiologic jaundice, but nothing too serious. He's pooping frequently, so his jaundice should resolve soon. I had more afterpains today, but they've resolved once I passed a couple of small clots.

Day 6 (Monday, December 5th)

Jacob's first FuzziBunz cloth diaper

The remnants of Jacob's umbilical cord fell off today! I noticed a slight redness in his diaper area so I put on his first FuzziBunz cloth diaper. The FuzziBunz diapers are so soft & comfortable - I am in love with them!
Now that my breast engorgement has resolved I have started to drink the Oasis Organic Power Booster & Prolactation Tea to produce more milk. The enlarged lymph node in my right armpit has resolved - what a relief! I've been able to feed Jacob breast milk for most of the day except 1-2 times a day when he is super hungry & I run out of it. The goal now is to get him off the finger feeding, so I will try the syringe with a tube at my breast tomorrow to encourage him to take my nipple. There is a long road ahead. I hope I'll see the light at the end of the tunnel soon - Jacob exclusively at my breast!
My pubis is still sore & I also have achy back & shoulders. It's like I can't straighten myself up. I am constantly hunched over pumping or finger feeding Jacob. Looking forward to another massage later this week.

Day 7 (Tuesday, December 6th)

Maxi practices cosleeping with Jacob

Today I learned how to wash my FuzziBunz cloth diapers. They must be taken care of properly to ensure their longevity. I've decided to wait a few weeks to use the cloth diapers again since they look so bulky & big on Jacob.
My pelvic area still achy, especially when I cough. I have to splint my abdomen with my hands (abdominal binder would have been helpful). I surprised myself by laying on my back today & it felt wonderful. I haven't done it for so many months, I forgot I can do it again. Also when I hug my kids or put them on my lap, I automatically extend my arms longer forgetting that I don't have a large belly anymore. My body definitely has a memory of its own.

Jacob meets grandma Chris

Grandpa Gerry & grandma Chris visited us today. They brought presents for baby Jacob as well as for Gerritt & Sophia. We received another bouquet of flowers. The best gift of all were several containers of frozen homemade meals. Our mini-freezer in the garage is full to the max - a comforting feeling for me. I am not in a rush to start cooking again!

Sophia tries on singing & dancing Santa's elf hat - present from grandma Chris & grandpa Gerry

I love her cheeks!

Today I did more pumping (about every 2 hours). With grandma & gradpa visiting there was no time to attempt latching at the breast. I had a good phone conversation with my friend who is a lactation specialist about trying the nipple shield & SNS system at the breast. Perhaps tomorrow..
I weighed 145 lbs today. I've already lost 18 lbs since the delivery. Only 15 lbs to go to get back to my pre-pregnancy weight. I am so satisfied with my post-pregnancy body, I am not too concerned about the weight. I am totally comfortable with it happening gradually, just like after my last 2 pregnancies.

Things that I found to be really helpful:

- Peri bottle
- Large absorbent maxi pads
- Earth Mama Angel Baby Booby Tubes (which can be used warm or cold, depending on one's nursing needs)
- Earth Mama Angel Baby Mama Bottom Balm (which can be used for hemorrhoids, perineal swelling/bruising & stitches)
- Frozen in advance meals & a pantry well stocked with snacks
- A large comfortable rocking recliner chair & multiple small pillows for resting & nursing
- Electric hospital-grade breast pump (if you anticipate breastfeeding problems)
- A microwavable neck/shoulder heating pad (to help with achy shoulders & to encourage milk letdown)
- Wool socks (to keep feet warm) & warm shirt with easy access in front (for pumping/breastfeeding)
- Delaying most of the visitors until the 2nd post-partum week
- Netflix :-)

Final afterthoughts:

This post-partum recovery has been the easiest & the fastest out of all 3. It's definitely a night & day difference compared to my post-C-section recovery & even my hospital VBAC. Thankfully, the worst part, painful breast engorgement, is a distant memory now.
The bonding process has been effortless. The post-birth afterglow lasted about a week. I haven't experienced any post partum blues. Instead I feel empowered & in control of my life & my family. I was up doing "light duty" things on the day I gave birth. As I mentioned before I was able to sit immediately after delivering Jacob & haven't experience any urinary incontinence (I am pretty sure it has a lot to do with me giving birth on all fours instead of laying in a semi-reclined position).
Someone recently asked me what I did 2 days ago & I couldn't remember, as hard as I tried. I learned that during post-partum recovery it's helpful not to look forward or back (e.g., "I still have so many months of sleepless nights ahead of me"). The best survival strategy is taking it one day at a time. I am relieved the difficult first week is behind us. It has only been a week since Jacob's birth, but I feel our family has already made great strides in welcoming him into our arms & hearts!

Jacob's Birth Story

2011-12-03T23:42:00.001-08:00

Warning: I've edited my birth photos as much as it was possible. However, if you are not a "birth junkie" like me, you may still find them too graphic.

It has been 5 days since son's birth & I am still processing all of the events that led up to his arrival. Jacob Samuel Hong was born at home on November 29th at 4:59 am at exactly 41 weeks of gestation. He weighed 8 lbs 5 oz & was 21.5" long.
I did a lot of preparation for my homebirth, but in the end all I needed were a pair of skilled hands & a towel. That's right, I didn't get to light the candles; listen to the labor music/hypnobirthing CDs I prepared especially for this occasion; fill the birthing tub; enjoy the aromatherapy; drink Laboraid & have labor snacks; videotape & photograph my birth & use the loving skills of my wonderful doula.

Shon inflating the birth tub on the evening prior to Jacob's birth

Loads of fun for the kids!

On the evening prior to Jacob's birth, I felt discouraged & depressed since I was going to be 41 weeks pregnant the next day. My midwife just sent me an email asking me to schedule an ultrasound since she felt my amniotic fluid levels were low. Even without an ultrasound I knew she was probably right since my abdomen measured small for my gestational age & every time I layed down I could easily palpate the baby - there was hardly any cushion around him. However, he kept up his usual strong & frequent kicks inside my belly, which was reassuring. I spent a couple of hours outdoors raking the leaves that afternoon & then cried for most of the evening. I was afraid of the ultrasound finding something wrong & then having to go to the hospital to be induced. Hello, the cascade of unwanted interventions. I truly felt desperate & like I was at the end of my rope.
Low & behold, I started to have mild cramps in my abdomen (didn't feel like contractions at all) at about 9 pm - about 1 every 30" that same evening. I suddenly got an urgent need to inflate the birth tub, which Shon did just prior to us going to bed. The kids had a blast playing inside it for about an hour. I tidied up the kitchen, vacuumed the carpet & straightened up the living room (to have the house as clean as possible, just in case). Sophia went to bed with Daddy while Gerritt & I stayed up reading books. We went to sleep at around 11 pm.
I fell asleep soundly & barely woke myself up due to pressure & uncomfortable feeling in my abdomen around 2:30 am. It felt like my bladder was full to the max & I needed to have a bowel movement. I really didn't want to get out of my warm bed so I stayed in bed until 3 am when I couldn't take it anymore. Getting out of bed was very uncomfortable - again, nothing that you would call contractions, but more of spasming cramps.
Even though it felt like my bladder was full, when I tried to urinate, only a trickle of fluid came. I panicked for a few seconds. The fact that I couldn't pee meant that the baby's head was so low in my pelvis, it was putting pressure on my bladder. I relaxed more & was finally able to fully empty my bladder. In the next 30" I had multiple loose bowel movements. I started to get excited since I knew the bowel emptying was one of the signs of my body preparing for labor.
I started to feel the contractions (still spaced out) while sitting on the toilet. I knew they had to pick up before I would wake up my midwife & doula. I walked to the living room & went online to figure out my contraction pattern using the Contraction Master. I timed exactly one contraction before I realized I couldn't comfortably stand there. Suddenly, my contractions became more intense, requiring me focusing & breathing through them. I put on my headphones to listen to my hypnobirthing CD.

"Look up at the ceiling & try to find a spot to stare at. Try not to blink.

On the count of 3 you'll close your eyes, & when you do I want you to feel that deep feeling of release & bring it all the way down & out through your toes. Ready?

Your eyelids are feeling very heavy now..."

With hypnobirthing failing to bring me any relief I realized I was far too advanced in my labor for the words to by useful. I took off the headphones & decided I needed to call someone on my labor team NOW.
With shaky hands, I dialed the phone number of my doula Patti Ramos at around 3:45 am telling her that my labor has begun. She responded warmly, "I've been expecting to hear from you." We both decided she should probably be at my house by 6 am & I would give her a call back if my labor picked up. Then I called my midwife's apprentice Kat to give her "heads up," so she could start getting ready. I knew I needed fluids & food to have the energy for the upcoming birth so I drank a large glass of water & put in a bowl of oatmeal in the microwave to be cooked. By then my contractions intensified even more so I called Patti back & told her to come in sooner than 6 am. She promised to be at my house within 1 hour. I also called my midwife Charlene who also said she would leave soon.
Then I remembered that my birth would be videotaped & photographed so I went back to the bathroom to put on a comfortable dress, fix my hair & apply makeup. Somewhere in between those activities, I felt a wet sensation in my underwear only to find that I had a bloody "show" (a sure sign of labor). I called Charlene again to relay this new finding to her & woke up Shon (around 4:15 am). With Shon busy filling the birth tub, I went back to the bathroom. While brushing my teeth I felt a strong urge to push. The contraction was so strong, I started to moan loudly, "Aaaaaaaaaaaah!" Once the contraction was over, I got on all fours when another urge to push came over me. "Aaaaaaaaaaaah!" Once the pushing sensation passed, I swore "S***!" By then Shon heard my moans & asked, "Baby, are you pushing?" I barely caught my breath to say, "Yes, I am."
It took everything I had to get out of the bathroom. I put a large towel on our living room rug & got on all fours again. It was around 4:45 am & I was actively pushing. Shon asked if he should call 911 (my midwife hasn't arrived yet) & I reassured him that we could handle it by ourselves.
Jacob's head was crowning & I felt like I was being split in two. The all too familiar "ring of fire" was burning my perineum. It took everything I had not to push the baby out right then. I panted & stayed still trying to slow things down. First, to give my tissues enough time to stretch to avoid a tear. Second, to buy my labor team more time. Jacob's body retreated back into my uterus, only for it to start the whole baby expulsion process again in about 2 minutes. His head crowned once more. I did more panting & relaxing as much as possible & miraculously was able to keep Jacob inside me for the 2nd time.

At that moment Kat walked in & quickly put on her gloves. I yelled at Shon, "Grab the camera!" Another strong urge to push took over & I didn't resist it this time. More burning ring of fire & then a sudden relief. I asked Kat if the baby's head was born & she affirmed it was.

Jacob's body easily slipped out just a couple of minutes later at 4:59 am. Kat caught the baby & handed him to me between my legs (I was standing on my knees by then). I put him on my chest & wrapped a blanket around him for warmth. My midwife Charlene walked in a few seconds later. She had a feeling my labor would progress really fast & called Kat while driving & told her to hurry.

The first look

Birth euphoria

I always thought I would cry when I met Jacob for the first time. I imagined the moment so many times & my eyes welled up with tears when I thought about looking into his precious face for the first time. But no tears came on Jacob's birth day. The speed, the suprise & the adrenalin rush of the preceeding 2 hours left me unable to process the magnitude of what just had happened. Thankfully, my body instinctively knew what to do, but my mind was still cathing up.

I studied Jacob's features overwhelmed by love for this tiny stranger familiar to me only through his kicks in my belly. Once the umbilical cord stopped pulsing, it was cut to allow me greater mobility. While cradling Jacob in my arms, I slowly moved closer to the couch. I laid down to rest & to await for the delivery of the placenta. My midwife chose active management of the 3rd stage of labor due to my history of low platelets, so I received an injection of oxytocin in my arm to contract my uterus & minimize any chance of post-partum hemorrhage. Sometime after my doula & her assistant have arrived.

My placenta didn't want to come out while I was laying down, so I got up & squatted next to the couch. The placenta came out a few minutes later with gentle traction on the umbilical cord, & Kat took it to the bathroom for a thorough exam. It was thin & "shreddy" in a few places so Jacob was definitely ready to be born.

I spent the new few hours resting & cuddling with Jacob on the couch. Because of the physiologic fluid shifting I was very thirsty & couldn't get enough of the coconut water. I drank 1 small container of it about every 20 minutes. I also got to finally eat my oatmeal!
My midwife & her apprentice examined my perineum - just one small tear on right vaginal wall (not big enough to require sutures). They also checked my vitals & the firmness of my uterine fundus. There were no antibiotic eye ointment or vitamin K shot for Jacob, & his newborn exam was conducted a couple of hours after his birth while I securely held him in my arms. He looked so helpless & small & I gave birth so easily, I estimated his weight to be around 7 lbs & was shocked to learn that he was over 8 lbs!
Our toy poodle Maxi became very protective of the baby & me. He didn't want to leave my side. His small furry body felt wonderfully warm next to me. However, he kept jumping on & nipping at anyone who tried to touch Jacob & I so after a while Shon locked him in the office. :-)

Sophia & Gerritt slept through the whole thing including my loud labor moans, Shon going in & out of Sophia's bedroom to fill the birth tub, dog barking & presence of so many people.
My nanny arrived at 8:30 am & happily learned that Jacob was born. She woke up & dressed Sophia & Gerritt. Usually the shy one, Sophia didn't show any fear of so many strangers being present in our living room. She walked up to me & smiled pointing at Jacob, "Baby is here!" Gerritt was more reserved & seemed overwhelmed. The plan was for Gerritt & Sophia to go to my friend's house for the rest of the day, but only Sophia agreed to go. Gerritt refused to leave my side so we just let him stay. To cheer him up, we encouraged him to get into my now filled with water birth tub. He really enjoyed swimming & playing in it. At noon he decided he wanted to join Sophia after all & Shon took him to my friend's house. My doula encouraged me to get into the birth tub with Jacob (she really wanted to photograph us in water), but fatigue got the best of me. I simply didn't want to get off the couch.
My midwife & her apprentice Kat left the house around 10 am. Kat took my refrigerated placenta with her to be encapsulated. My doula & her assistant stayed until about 11 am. They straightened up the house, took photos & made sure I was comfortable. My poor husband who took care of everyone else all morning hasn't had anything to eat or drink since I woke him up, so he finally had a snack.
So in a nutshell, this is my birth story. I am still feeling the birth "high," especially because I didn't just have a home birth, but a home VBAC (vaginal birth after Cesarean). This was also my 2nd VBAC. Although my home birth didn't go as planned, I am very satisfied with the outcome. Even though my hospital VBAC 2.5 years ago was also a success, nothing came even close to my experience of giving birth at home. This birth has been my best! Every woman deserves to have such an empowering & liberating birth experience whether she gives birth at home, at the birthing center or in the hospital.
I feel tremendous gratitude for my midwife. Although she didn't "catch" Jacob, the mere fact that she was willing to take on a home VBAC made this birth story possible. As I journied through this pregnancy & birth, I also have come to have a deeper appreciation of my husband. I love him even more for being so supportive as I pursued my dream birth even though he didn't agree with a home birth idea at first. Instead of trying to change my mind, he chose to trust my ability to make the best decision for me & our unborn child. A man who is pretty conventional in the way he lives his life came to accept his wife "going hippie" on him, complete with a home birth & eating her own placenta.
Welcome Earthside & happy birthday, my dear Jacob! I am so excited to be your Mommy!

"There is no other experience in life that can remotely compare to this ... when your newly born baby opens his or her eyes for the first time and then turns to look up into yours with an unconditional love that is purely indescribable. In that very instant, you learn the true meaning of vulnerability." -Patti Ramos

Still Awaiting My Little Miracle

2011-11-28T12:49:00.000-08:00

Here I am 40 weeks & 6 days pregnant & still no baby! I've never expected this pregnancy to last this long. It would be a lie if I said it has been easy emotionally. In fact, it has been an emotional rollercoaster. I've experienced feelings of anticipation, excitement & acceptance, but also disappointment, sadness & even anger. Some days it felt like I've been expecting Christmas, & it never came. I also had anxious thoughts of something being wrong & my body possibly failing me. I started to imagine the worst case scenario of never starting labor on its own & having to go to the hospital for an artificial labor induction with Pitocin. A possibility of having to say goodbye to my dream home birth after all the preparation & having to come this far was really hard to think about.
According to The Center for Unhindered Living, mother's emotional condition can prevent labor from starting. Examples include anxiety over not having everything ready for the birth, wanting to subconsciously hang on to the pregnancy, fear of childbirth experience, dissatisfaction with caregivers/birth place/marital situation, fear of motherhood, or experiencing too much stress. I don't feel like any of the above examples apply to me unless I am subconsciously feeling anxious about not having the birthing pool inflated. :-) I have been nesting for weeks. The house is organized & clean, birthing supplies are in order, & I have a freezer full of delicious meals. On a spiritual note, according to the same website, in order to make sure the baby is born with the necessary personality characteristics to carry out his planned earthy existence, he will often hold up being born until he can be born into the correct astrological sign. Hmmm, interesting idea...
On a positive note, I feel grateful again for having chosen a midwife instead of a conventional OB/GYN for my obstetric healthcare needs. There is no worry about being pressured into labor induction unless I pass 42 weeks AND the ultrasound looks abnormal. I am also grateful for not being the typical Baby Center Mom who gets induced at a drop of a hat because she failed to do her own research & left all decision making up to her doctor. I have faith in my body & trust Jacob to be born when he is ready.
It has been emotionally helpful to adjust my due date. My due date of November 22nd was calculated using the commonly used Naegele's Rule. It turns out a more accurate way to calculate the expected due date is to use the formula by Mittendorf et al.: Multiparas (women who've had children before) start with the date of LMP (last menstrual period), substract 3 months & add 10 days. The Mittendorf et al's calculation changed my due date to December 1st!
A homebirthing Mom, Dr. Nancy of Your Birth Coach, encourages women to be relaxed with their due dates & add 3 weeks to the 40 week due date to decrease feelings of frustration & sadness. As far as safety is concerned, the risk of a stillborn baby is the same at 37 and 43 weeks (!). Giving birth between 37 & 42 weeks is even NORMAL according to ACOG (the American College of Obstetricians & Gynecologists).
So the plan is to relax, take naps, read books, go for nice walks, listen to hypnobirthing CDs, think positive thoughts & enjoy my last few days of relatively carefree time!

The Birthing Dance

Come to me, My Child
Secret longing of my inner heart
Breath of spirit
Wandering the cosmos
Choosing your next lifepath
Seeking sanctuary in my wonb
Visions of you stir my dreams
Your gentle essence drifting inward
Merging into matter
Coming into consciousness
Birthing into being
Your tender wisdom speaks
The ancient knowledge
of a mother's power
Our bodies grow together
Two as one
Turning round, in birthing dance
You lead me
Opening the circle corridor
Descending into unhindered ecstasy
Into my arms

Judie C. McMath

Additional Resources:

1) The Lie of the Estimated Due Date (EDD): Why Your Due Date Is Not What You Think by Misha Safranski

2) When Are you Due? by Dr. Nancy from Your Birth Coach

3) ACOG: Post Dates is Past 42 Weeks by Birth Without Fear

4) ACOG Releases Guidelines on Management of Post-term Pregnancy by M. Neff from teh American Family Physician

Thanksgiving

2011-11-24T19:34:00.000-08:00

It's already Thanksgiving! I was a bit nervous about possibly having the baby today (I would prefer Jacob's birthday not to be forever associated with this holiday), but my mild contractions early this afternoon subsided again by the evening time. Although I would never induce labor for convenience of a health care provider (did you know that induction & C-section rates are higher around major holidays?), I was slightly relieved not having to call my midwife, her students, my doula & placenta encapsulation specialist today.

Shon carving turkey

Turkey treats for dogs

I spent most of the morning talking on the phone with my Mom, Chris & Gerry, our nanny & doula (all of them wanted to be reassured that they were not missing anything exciting). Later on, after putting the turkey in the oven, Shon drove to Tacoma to pick up his Mom. He brought back our 2 dogs (who were dropped off last weekend due to nearing birth) & her 2 dogs, so our house became full of animals again!

Dancing to Lady Gaga

Goofing off with Korean grandma

We spent the day cooking, laughing, dancing & playing. The pumpkin pie & cranberry-orange sauce I froze during my nesting period were a big hit. Korean grandma couldn't get enough of Sophia & Gerritt. It has been a few weeks since she has seen me, so she kept touching & admiring my belly. I kept thinking about this being our last Thanksgiving as a family of 4.

The girls

More fun times with grandma

We have so many things to be thankful for this year. Healthy & happy children, secure & satisfying jobs, a new baby & my Mom's move to the US. I have no idea when Jacob will join us, but hopefully within the next 2 weeks!

Gerritt is not a fan of the flash (I am 40 weeks 2 days pregnant with Jacob)

Grandma loves to dance too!

Sophia takes time to smell the roses

The Santa photo booths have already been set up in several malls near us, however, we will not be visiting Santa for our annual Christmas photo until Jacob arrives!

Additional Resources:

Induction and the Holidays by Cara Terreri from Giving Birth with Confidence

40 weeks

2011-11-22T08:17:00.001-08:00

40 weeks

I can't believe I am near the end of my pregnancy. I am 40 weeks today! Gerritt was born at 39 weeks 3 days & Sophia came at 40 weeks 2 days (after membrane stripping). I would not be terribly upset going over 40 weeks, & I will not be doing any special techniques to induce labor this time. This baby will come when he is ready to be born. The article by Dr. Nancy When Are You Due? is very reassuring about carrying a pregnancy for longer than 40 weeks. Anywhere between 37 & 43 weeks is considered normal. 80% of babies are born within the 2 weeks before or after 40 weeks & only about 5% of babies are born on their "due dates." Another article titled ACOG: Post Dates is Past 42 Weeks by Birth Without Fear is comforting as well.

"Attending births is like growing roses. You have to marvel at the ones that just open up and bloom at the first kiss of the sun but you wouldn't dream of pulling open the petals of the tightly closed buds and forcing them to blossom to your time line." Gloria Lemay

As far as I am concerned, this pregnancy went by too fast. I am excited to meet my baby, but I am also slightly afraid of going through labor again. Giving birth is like a journey into the unknown, having to trust higher power & giving up all control in the process.

"When you have come to the edge of all the light you know and are about to step off into the darkness of the unknown, faith is knowing that one of two things will happen: there will be something solid to stand on or you will be taught how to fly." Patrick Overter

I had mild contractions around 4 am yesterday. I tried to mentally connect with Jacob & keep all my fears away. I knew I needed to conserve my energy for the long day ahead, so I stayed in bed, snuggled up next to Gerritt & ... fell asleep. When I awoke at 7 am, the contractions were gone.

Gerritt examining the table with home birth supplies

Friday was my last day of work at the clinic & I celebrated by going to see the new Twilight movie Breaking Dawn in the evening. I felt useless & lost for the next couple of days (I probably need therapy since I don't know what to do with myself when I don't have to go to work). I stayed busy doing one of my favorite activities - blogging. I prepared most of the outline for posts on placenta encapsulation & cloth diapering. Writing a thorough & informative article on a particular topic takes time & research. I will have so little of that once the baby comes.

Pomegranates - the latest craving

Other than writing, I am spending quality time with Gerritt & Sophia, knowing they will probably not get much one-on-one time with me for the next few weeks. Gerritt discovered a few more of his favorite books:

Dr. Seuss's ABC
Harry and the Bucketful of Dinosaurs by Ian Whybrow & Adrian Reynolds
Room on the Broom by Julia Donaldson & Axel Scheffler
Clifford's Halloween by Norman Bridwell
Clifford's First Sleepover by Norman Bridwell

I am also obsessed about keeping the house spotless. I could go into labor at any time & I would be embarrassed if my birth assistants saw any mess. It's actually kind of nice to have these few days of nothing to do, it's own "calm before the storm," although having your 3rd baby is nothing like your 1st (it gets easier).

Sophia practicing feeding her baby

Today my nanny Irina & I took Gerritt, Sophia & Anna to play at the Kids' Cove at the Bellevue Square. In the afternoon, while they napped, I went to see Breaking Dawn movie for the 2nd time. Then grocery shopping, a couple of loads of laundry, bill paying, more pregnancy photos... I am feeling unusually unproductive. In the evening, as I was watching my kids playing in the living room, I thought about our plans to have the baby at home & it felt surreal. It has been a long journey & I really hope to have my perfect ending soon. :-)

Helpful Resources:

Affirmations & Visualizations for Birth

We Have a Name!

2011-11-19T20:58:00.000-08:00

We have finally settled on a name for our little boy! We couldn't agree on anything for the longest time. Naming our first 2 children was relatively easy. We always knew we would name our firstborn son Gerritt to honor my American father Gerry. Gerritt's middle name Jinwon was meant to honor Shon's father. Then when our daughter came along, we named her Sophia because her name was feminine & sounded so beautiful. Sophia's middle name Christine was chosen after my American mother Chris. We started thinking about names for our second son pretty early on, however, it was harder than we expected. Name Jacob came to us only about a week ago.

Jacob is currently one of the most popular boys' name in the US, & we liked it because it sounded strong & masculine. It is of Hebrew origin, & the meaning of Jacob is "he who supplants," or takes by the heel.
There is a meaningful biblical story that goes along with this name. According to the Bible, Jacob was the son of Isaac & Rebecca & the grandson of Abraham. He was the 2nd born of a set of twins & he came out holding onto his brother's Esau's heel. Later, he talked Esau into trading his firstborn inheritance for a bowl of soup & tricked his father into giving him the blessing reserved for the firstborn.

I am going to pretend that werewolf Jacob Black from one of my favorite book series Twilight didn't influence me at all...

Despite this story of ambitious trickery, Jacob was chosen by God for greatness. Notable moments in his life include reconciling with his brother, dreaming about a stairway between heaven & earth (commonly referred to as "Jacob's Ladder"), wrestling with the angel of God until he received God's blessing, & receiving the new name Israel from God (which means "God prevails"). Jacob was also the father of the 12 sons from whom the 12 tribes of Israel descended (read Genesis 25-35 to learn the story of Jacob).
We are still pondering our son's middle name, but I am so relieved we already chose a purposeful & worthwhile first name!

39 weeks

2011-11-15T17:16:00.000-08:00

39 weeks 2 days

The birth preparations are in full swing. This weekend Shon & I raked the fallen leaves in the front of our house (we have a huge flowering cherry tree, which is beautiful in spring, but requires a lot of clean-up in the fall). I have finished most of the things on my to-do list for the past 4 days (my last break before 3 more days of work).
I organized all my clothes drawers (another pile of things for GoodWill ready to go), vacuumed & dusted my bedroom, put away all of the kids' toys from the living room (we need more space for my birthing tub & birth assistants), put away the kids' summer shoes to clear the house entry way & re-organized my birth supply table.
The candles & the CD player are out & photo camera & video camera are ready to go. I have also cleaned out the refrigerator, ran a self-cleanining oven cycle, washed the cloth diapers (new ones need to be washed prior to first use) & polished all glass surfaces.
I washed windows & floors (on my hands & knees) which was a perfect exercise to prevent occiput posterior baby positioning. I picked up my rental electric breast pump & made Laboraid drink to be put in the freezer. I took Gerritt for his dental cleaning & made fresh hummingbird food. I made a list of my favorite foods to eat during labor (per request of my birth assistants) & To-Do list when labor starts & posted both on the refrigerator. I feel like this baby will not come unless the house is absolutely perfect!
Although all of the above activities were deeply satisfying, the most fun activity was shopping for the kids' presents. I have created them out of the 1$ items at Target & Old Navy to be given after the baby's birth as something sweet from their new brother. I have definitely put way more preparation effort into this birth than ever before (know better, do better, right?).
I had another appointment with Charlene this week & gained 3 more pounds. So much for being smaller than average earlier in the pregnancy. I've gained weight the most quickly during the last 2 weeks. I was right not to go back for those recommended repeat ultrasounds. My short cervix didn't stop me from making it past 39 weeks already. I have been wearing my Supple Cups faithfully for at least 4 hours every day for the past 2 weeks, & I am starting to see some improvement in the shape of my nipples. I have also been listening to the hypnobirthing CD at bedtime. Gerritt actually fell in love with the soothing voice of the hypnobirthing lady, so he has been requesting to listen to it with me.
I've finally received some good news about my Mom. It looks like our long & time-consuming paperwork journey will soon come to an end. The INS has scheduled the immigration interview for her on December 22nd, so she'll probably be here by Christmas! Along with the medical exam, this is the last step in the permanent immigration process. We couldn't have asked for a better Christmas present. Our new son should be about a month old by then. What a blessing for all of us for my Mom not to just come for a few short weeks & then have to tearfully say goodbye, but live next to us & her beloved grandchildren on a more permanent basis. I would have loved to have her here for the baby's birth, but since she is not going to make it, the next best thing will be the birth video we are planning to record. I can't believe I will meet my baby in just a few days!

Solutions for Flat and Inverted Nipples

2011-11-10T21:49:00.001-08:00

This week I met with my lactation consultant & received a set of the Supple Cups to try. This is something to be really excited about since I have flat nipples. I've had considerable difficulty breastfeeding both of my children. It was a lack of confidence & belief that I could do it with my firstborn son (an unplanned C-section will do that to you). It was lack of adequate support & education with my second-born daughter.
I've tried it all... I used the Medela contact nipple shields, Medela SoftShells for inverted nipples, the SNS (supplemental nursing system - where you pump breastmilk, then slowly feed it to your baby via a thin tube while he is at the breast), & even exclusive pumping for almost 4 months. The last one was hard since I had to pump at least every 3 hours during the day & go no longer than 5 hours at night in addition to bottle-feeding my baby. It felt like a full-time job.
Not being able to breastfeed contributed significantly to my post-partum blues making me feel like a total failure as a mother. I dreamed about being able to breastfeed naturally while snuggling & having skin-to-skin with my baby; not having to wake up during the night in order to attach myself to a cold machine & pump with the lights on; not having to drag the pump with me everywhere I went & arrange my life around the pumping schedule in order to maintain my milk supply; not having to pack premade formula with me while running errands with baby, & being able to just roll over in bed & breastfeed my baby at night without fully waking up.

That's why I jumped on a chance to try the relatively new on the market Supple Cups. The Cups are made of soft silicone & help by stretching the nipples using gentle vacuum. The use instructions state applying a small amount of lanolin onto both nipples & inside the Cups, centering the Cups onto the nipples & then squeezing the bottoms of the Cups while gently pressing them onto the nipples.
The Cups can be worn for 4-8 hours per day (but only 1-2 hours on the 1st day) starting in the 37th week of pregnancy (if a woman is not at risk for preterm labor). They can also be used post-partum. It's helpful to wear them for 2-5 minutes to draw out nipples before attempting to latch baby (especially during engorgement when nipples are flattened).

As someone who has tried the Philips Avent Niplettes (see photo above), I have a clear preference for the Supple Cups. First of all, the Cups are soft & flexible compared to rigid Niplettes which painfully dig into the breast tissue. Second, the Cups come in 3 different sizes & are able to accomodate nipples of various sizes compared to the Niplette's one-size-fits-all approach. Also the Cups stay on more easily since they don't have any plastic extensions (which can painfully stretch the nipples when accidently bumped). I can't really sit still for 4 hours so the Cups allow me greater mobility (I wouldn't go running, but I am able to do housework, for example).

I have also tried the Medela SoftShells for Inverted Nipples (see photo above) & had to stop after about 3 days due to itchy rash around my areolas. The Shells are supposed to be worn for several hours at a time, but don't allow much air circulation. They are also bulky & fall off relatively easily (it's not fun finding out that halfway through your shell-wearing session that the shell has moved & has been applying pressure to the wrong part of the breast).
The Cups give me hope for successful breastfeeding this time, & I feel truly inspired!

Additional Resources:

1) Breastfeeding With Flat or Inverted Nipples by Becky Flora, BSed, IBCLC

2) Flat or Inverted Nipples by Anne Smith, IBCLC

3) Flat or Inverted Nipples by Barbara Wilson-Clay, BSEd, IBCLC

4) Do I Have Flat or Inverted Nipples?

Hypnobirthing

2011-11-09T10:08:00.001-08:00

As I mentioned in several of my other posts, I used hypnobirthing to manage labor pain during natural childbirth with my two children. I don't remember how I discovered it, just that I was sceptical at first, however, the results spoke for themselves.
What is hypnobirthing? It is a childbirth preparation method that focuses on deep relaxation, visualization & self-hypnosis. The purpose of hypnobirthing is to keep a laboring woman feeling peaceful & relaxed while decreasing her fear & increasing the flow of endorphins (the "feel good" hormones). Rather than exhausting, shallow breathing & the distraction techniques taught in a typical childbirth preparation course, hypnobirthing emphasizes deep abdominal breathing & total relaxation, allowing the woman to achieve a shorter & more comfortable labor.
Hypnobirthing mothers are not unconscious during self-hyphosis, but rather deeply relaxed & focused similar to loosing self for a few minutes while staring into a fire place or daydreaming.
Although hyphobirthing doesn't promise painless birthing, many women report labor that they were able to manage easily. When the cause of pain - fear - is eliminated, birthing mothers produce more endorphins (natural pain relievers) & thus avoid the excruciating pain that is often spoken of by laboring women choosing other methods of birth preparation.
I personally can attest to that as I experienced only mild discomfort while being nearly fully dilated with both of my kids. Because of hypnobirthing the only truly painful part of giving birth for me was the head crowning (which is, thankfully, relatively short). I now can't imagine any other way to prepare for birth!

Resources:

1) HypnoBirthing - The Mongan Method

2) Hypnobabies

3) The Leclaire Hypnobirthing Method

4) HypBirth (the program I've been using)

5) Positive Birth - hypnobirthing online course

38 weeks

2011-11-08T22:31:00.001-08:00

38 weeks 1 day

My belly has grown even more & almost overnight, it seems. I have gained 3 pounds since last week's appointment with Charlene. The baby must have dropped somewhat since I walk like a duck & have to urinate every couple of hours. Thankfully, my sleep has improved & I don't wake up at 3 or 4 am anymore. It's hard to believe I only have a couple of weeks of good sleep left. Both Gerritt & Sophia were up at least twice a night for the 1st year, so my chances for getting more sleep with this baby are slim.
I have started to get more swelling in my legs, but other than that I still feel great. I can't do brisk walks anymore so my dogs have to pull me for most of the way. My back pain is almost gone thanks to regular chiropractic adjustments. Weekly massage sessions & having a nanny 5 days a week help to keep me relaxed & sane. It's now harder to find clothes that fits so I am down to a pair of pants & a few tops.
I had another visit with Barbara, the lactation consultant at the Birth & Beyond store, today & received Supple Cups to help draw out my flat nipples. There is always a possibility of breast stimulation bringing on labor, so it's a perfect time for me to try them. This product is so new that Barbara really wanted my feedback on whether they would work for me.

Me, "You need to try a different angle. I look huge!" Shon, "Honey, but you are!"

I have recently organized my breastfeeding supply drawer. What do I have in there?

- Medela Tender Care Lanolin nipple cream (soothing relief for sore nipples)
- Nursing bras/tops
- BPA-free electric breast pump personal use kit
- Cotton nursing pads
- Medela Tender Care Hydrogel (to soothe sore nipples)
- Medela SoftShells for sore nipples (protects nipples from further irritation)
- MilkBands nursing bracelet (keeps track of which side you nursed from, what time & for how long)
- Earth Mama Angel Baby Booby Tubes (natural, gel-free, microwavable & freezable breast packs in organic cotton to help ease breast engorgement)
- BPA-free breastmilk storage bags (for milk freezing)
- Medela contact nipple shields (for flat/inverted nipples or latch-on difficulties)
I absolutely can't fail breastfeeding now!

Additional Resources:

What Breastfeeding Supplies Do I Need? (by KellyMom)

Gerritt insisted on being in most of my pregnancy photos

Good news! My Mom's immigration paperwork went through without a glitch (I received a confirmation email from the INS only 5 days after mailing all of the application documents last week). My many hours of reading, translating & document editing have paid off. Nothing was missing except MY original (or notarized copy) marriage certificate. I mailed it the next day using the overnight mail. My Mom should be getting an immigration visa within a few weeks. Whether I am ready to deal with her on a full-time basis is another story, but for now I desperately need help with a new baby.

The head dress I made for Sophia from the leaves found during my walk today

The autumn princess

Gerritt kisses Sophia during dance (he has been wearing his new favorite Spiderman pajamas for several days in a row)

Too dizzy to do any more dancing

We are still debating when to set up the birthing tub. We inflated it this past weekend just to make sure it worked. The kids decided it was an iflatable playground & spent much time climbing & jumping in it. The tub then had to be put away for it to have a chance to serve its true purpose. I am thinking we'll probably put it back up a week before my due date. Shon researched & ordered a lead-free gardening hose online in order to be able to feel the tub quickly when needed.
I am starting to get a little anxious about the upcoming birth. I am wondering whether I'll be able to handle natural labor & whether the baby is healthy. I also hope the presence of so many people during birth will not hinder my labor progress (my midwife + 2 students, my doula + 1 assistant, Shon, Sophia, Gerritt & our nanny). I will probably not care who is around me once I am in the midst of active labor, however, the fear of performance anxiety is always there. I am also afraid of having another occiput posterior baby & having a long, painful back labor & even possible hospital transfer. The fact is birth is unpredictable, & I will have to cross that bridge when I get there. I trust my body & know that my chances for another successful VBAC are greater at home than in the hospital. Less than 2 weeks to go!

"If you want to feel sad, live in the past. If you want to feel anxious, live in the future. If you want to feel peaceful, live in the now." - Author unknown

Why I Chose a Home Birth

2011-11-07T21:12:00.001-08:00

I haven't always wanted a home birth. My firstborn son was born by an unexpected C-section despite my thorough preparation for a natural birth. When I got pregnant with my daughter, I wasn't sure whether my attempted VBAC would be a success. The thought of having a home VBAC didn't even cross my mind then.
Sophia's birth turned out to be perfect & healing. I delivered her quickly, easily & without complications, & that's when I started to trust my body again.
By the time I watched the Business of Being Born & found the blog of Gina, the Feminist Breeder, who was planning her first home VBAC, I knew I wanted my next birth to take place at home.
I also read about Danelle's home water birth (see Peaceful Parenting blog) & watched Rixa's home water birth on video (see Stand & Deliver blog). Both of these women are highly educated (in fact, they both have PhDs) & made an informed decision to deliver their babies at home. Most recently I watched online home birth video of chiropractor Dr. Nancy Salgueiro from Your Birth Coach. The deal was sealed.

In my mind there wasn't even a choice between hospital & home birth. After I learned about the kind of birth a woman could have, hospital birth was simply not an option anymore. By the time I did my research, I knew that home birth was the best choice for me & that experience would by far outshine anything I could expect (or settle for) in the hospital setting. I wanted to give myself & my next child that gift. Although it was important to have a healthy baby in my arms, my birthing experience had to matter too.
After talking to my husband (who was reluctant in the beginning) I set the wheels in motion by finding my midwife through the Mothering magazine online community (It's difficult to find a provider willing to do a home VBAC). Gradually, everything else slowly fell into place.
As I now have about 2 weeks left before my official due date, I wanted to write down the reasons I chose a home birth for my 3rd child. They've been floating in my head for many months now just waiting to be expressed.

1) I view birth as a natural & perfectly normal process, not a medical event or illness that needs lots of monitoring & interventions in order to proceed safely. While "medical model"/conventionally trained OB providers are indispensable in emergencies, few of them have ever witnessed an intervention-free home birth. Having experienced my share of hospital protocols (both as a nurse & a patient), I decided that the safest place for me to birth was my home. I trust my body & want to avoid an environment that looks for pathology at every turn.

The knowledge of how to give birth without outside interventions lies deep within each woman. Successful childbirth depends on an acceptance of the process. ~ Anonymous

2) Although I had relatively good pain control with my last two labors & one natural delivery (thanks to hypnobirthing), I truly believe I can be much more comfortable in the security of my home & through birthing in water. In a hospital environment women often produce the stress hormone adrenaline in response to their conscious or subconscious fear. As a result, the release of the hormone oxytocin is inhibited causing the labor to slow down, which usually leads to a cascade of potentially harmful medical interventions.

3) In my own home, I am in charge while everyone else is a guest. I would not need to ask permission to eat, get a drink, use a restroom, change positions, wear clothes or be naked, dim the lights or turn on music. If I feel strong & powerful, my labor will be more likely to progress as expected.

The parallels between making love and giving birth are clear, not only in terms of passion and love, but also because we need essentially the same conditions for both experiences: privacy and safety. ~ Sarah Buckley

4) I love the idea of not having to travel anywhere in the middle of the night (that bumpy car ride when you are almost fully dilated is pretty uncomfortable). It's so convenient to have people come to my house instead (no one needs to go pick up grandma from Tacoma or wake up the kids). I can also labor on my own for a while without waking up Shon (once he finds out I am in labor, he usually can't sleep & his anxiety can interfere with my concentration). Thanks to careful planning & preparation, everything I may need is at home.

5) I will be assisted through labor & delivery by highly-trained & competent providers I chose & with whom I have established therapeutic & caring relationships (there will be no strangers in the room), facilitating smoother & less stressful delivery through their support & continuity of care.

6) The chances of my birth plan wishes being respected are far greater at home than in the hospital. Being at home I am less likely to be coerced & make decisions out of fear, intimidation or desire to please someone else (something I often struggle with).

7) Multiple studies have confirmed that home birth was safe. The American College of OB/GYNs doesn't support planned home births (even for low risk women), & their position is that the only safe place to have a baby is at the hospital with access to the latest technology. However, this access hasn't brought us better healthcare outcomes. The US ranks only 43rd (!) out of 196 countries in the infant survival rate, according to the United Nations. So the smartest thing to do is to "get the hell out of the hospital" (an actual quote from the Business of Being Born documentary).

8) By staying at home I eliminate my chances of getting a hospital-acquired infection (such as drug-resistant bacteria).

9) My kids can be a part of this birth, or at least see the baby just minutes after he is born. This is something Gerritt (who is 4 years old) may remember for the rest of his life. I can even pet my dogs while in labor (even though I'll probably have Shon take them to grandma's house a week before my due date to eliminate constant barking at birth assistants coming in & out). I am thinking peace & serenity here...

10) After the birth, my baby will not be taken away from me for such routine hospital procedures as eye ointment application, vitamin K shot & first bath. My kids, husband & I can all climb into a family bed for emotional bonding & cuddling.

11) My placenta will not become a biohazard waste. Instead, it will be lovingly preserved as part of the placenta encapsulation process.

12) I can take as many photos as I like & also videotape my birth without having to ask for special permission.

Although I have a few anxieties as I approach my due date (it's my first home birth after all), it would be a shame not to even try.

Birth is not only about making babies. Birth is about making mothers ~ strong, competent, capable mothers who trust themselves and know their inner strength. ~ Barbara Katz Rothman

Nourishing Postpartum Meals

2011-11-07T21:02:00.000-08:00

I have been nesting big time & my strong urge to cook & freeze meals became part of it. I quickly ran out of space in our refrigerator freezer, which prompted Shon to buy an extra mini-freezer for our garage. :-) I still remember the complete exhaustion from taking care of a newborn during those first few weeks & having to resort to fast & junk food because you simply have no energy or brain power to come up with anything else. I wanted to avoid the same situation this time so I have been scouting for good recipes, grocery shopping, cooking & freezing for the past week.

Main courses:

1) Stuffed bell peppers
There are many recipes on the internet. Here is one variation . I substituted the white rice with brown rice & textured vegetable protein with organic ground beef. I also replaced mozzarella cheese with Monterey Jack cheese for sharper flavor.

2) Sweet Potato & Lentil Soup
I love this curried version. I substituted the lentil with organic Sprouted Bean Trio (mung beans, green lentils, adzuki beans) by truRoots (which I found at Costco).

3) Oxtail Soup
It's one of my favorite soups to make during fall & winter. There are many recipes, but mine is closer to this one.

4) Split Pea Soup
I substituted the ham bone in this recipe with sauteed bacon.

5) Baked Macaroni & Cheese
It's not the most nutritious, but nice to have when craving comfort foods after delivery (see recipe here).

Desserts:

Since reaching the 3rd trimester I've been having strong craving for cranberries (that's what you get having your baby around Thanksgiving!), so 2 dessert recipes contain them.

1) Pear Cranberry Crisp
I doubled the cranberries & lemon juice & added 1/2 cups of sugar in this recipe.

2) Apple Quinoa Muffins
See recipe here

3) Walnut Pumpkin Pie
I've added fresh ground ginger & 1/2 cup of ground flax seed to this recipe.

Other foods I chose to have readily available in the freezer:

- Cooked brown rice
- A couple of whole raw chickens (to make simple, but nutritious Lan Lan's Chicken Soup)
- Shelton's turkey sausage patties (can be found at our local PCC)
- Baked Cranberry-Orange Sauce (Thanksgiving is not that far away, see recipe here)
- Ice cream

Today was my last of cooking & I am exhausted. The mini-freezer is more than half-way full. I will not be touching the stove for a while. :-)

Additional Resources:

Once a Month Mom - fill your freezer by creating monthly menues using seasonal recipes

37 weeks

2011-11-03T14:12:00.000-07:00

37 weeks 2 days

I've made it to 37 weeks already. My blogger pregnancy count-down states I have only 17 days to go. How did I get here so fast? I had another midwife appointment yesterday. I haven't gained any weight for the past 2 weeks (I am still at 162 lbs). I've started my pregnancy weighing 133 lbs, so I am gaining weight appropriately. Hopefully, this means this baby will be less than 8 lbs. I actually think my belly looks relatively small being this far into the pregnancy (I was able to shave my legs this morning :-)).

Yesterday I put all of the birth supplies out on the table in the living room. I was originally thinking of giving birth in Shon's bedroom since its sliding door opened right into the back yard (easier to drain the birth tub), but decided to settle in the living room instead. The bedroom may be a bit crowded with our midwife, 2 students, my doula, her apprentice & Shon. Plus, if my labor starts in the middle of the night, I can come out of my bedroom & labor quietly for a few hours without waking up Shon or the kids. Now I have to come up with some way to cover the living room window (we currently don't have curtains).

"Sophia, where is baby?" "There!"

I've prepared a few CDs this week. It is meditation-type music to be played during labor:

1) Reiki - Hands of Light by Deuter

2) Inner Peace by Steven Halpern

3) Gifts of the Angels by Steven Halpern

4) Ocean Suite by Steven Halpern (I thought the sound of the ocean waves was very appropriate for a water birth)

I am surprised how good I feel. I've been feeling intermittent pressure & small electric shock-like sensations in my cervix for several weeks now. According to my favorite home birth book Birth Your Way, this means baby's head is in a good position. My walking is a bit wabbly & slow, otherwise I am able to keep up with my daily activities for the most part. That's probably why I am still in denial about the proximity of this baby's birth. I am so used to being uncomfortable that continuing this pregnancy for a few more months would not be so bad. :-) My midwife mentioned using primrose oil (oral & vaginal) to make sure the baby was not overdue, but I brushed off the idea. Being pregnant for 41 weeks or longer doesn't phase me, at least not yet. The baby will come when he is ready & I would never be selfish enough to interfere with the nature's process purely for my own comforts.
Gerritt & I have been getting ready for baby's birth by reading a couple of birth-related kids' books:

1) Welcome with Love by Jenni Overend (This is an excellent book from Australia portraying a home birth. There are several startling but beautiful images of the baby's head emerging from between Mom's standing legs, the baby boy with his umbilical cord reaching up & the naked mother on her knees cradling the baby in her arms. The baby's siblings get to witness the birth & end up cosleeping with the new baby & their parents at the end).

2) Waiting For Baby by Harriet Ziefert (A good book about preschooler Max impatiently awaiting the arrival of his little brother. Sadly, he misses the birth as his Mom has the baby in the hospital while he stays with his grandparents).

My Mom's photos have finally arrived & I mailed the 2nd part of her immigration paperwork last Monday. My hope is that she will arrive to the US by mid-December or sooner (my nanny really wants to move to Portland to be with her boyfriend by Christmas). I even have a Christmas stocking for my Mom with her name on it.

Daddy enjoys Gerritt & Sophia's kisses

Pure happiness

Good news! The length of my requested maternity leave was approved, so I have until February 1st off from my hospital job & until March 21st off from my Planned Parenthood clinic. Whether I will take my full requested leave is another matter (I always get restless after 4-5 weeks of staying at home), but I want that option nonetheless. I have no idea how I will feel once this baby comes. I've already learned from having 2 children how fleeting the time is & I may want to absorb & enjoy every moment of my newborn's cuteness.

Trick or Treat?

2011-10-31T22:42:00.000-07:00

This Halloween a friend of a friend invited us to her house for a Halloween-themed party. Everyone (kids & adults) were encouraged to wear costumes. Being 3 weeks away from delivery, all I could fit was an extra-large Halloween t-shirt I found in my Halloween storage box. Gerritt wore his bumblebee outfit while Sophia was a pink butterfly again (despite my strong encouragement for her to be Dorothy from the Wizzard of Oz).

At the craft table (Gerritt is making a necklace)

The evening was full of activities for the kids. They made bead necklaces, got prizes for their costumes & went trick-or-treating. It was Gerritt & Sophia's first time trick-or-treating & they absolutely loved it! By the end of the night, Gerritt was competing with his friend Anna to be the 1st one to ring the doorbells.

Sophia & a new turtle friend

Gerritt got a prize for the most "buzzy" costume :-)

Sophia got a prize for the most "bouncy" costume. Right at the beginning of the party she discovered a large leather couch & spent most of the evening climbing it & jumping on top of the soft pillows.

Getting ready to trick or treat

Heading out

Sophia admiring a pumpkin

Amazingly, Sophia kept up with the older kids (she was the 2nd youngest child in the group). I had to pick her up & run with her a few times not to be behind, but she insisted on doing most of the walking herself. I could hear her excited voice yelling, "Trick or treat!!!" and, of course, she was her usual polite self & said, "Thank you!" every time. People thought she was adorable & gave her lots of candy.

Trick or treat!

Thankfully, Sophia only liked to collect candy (like shiny interesting toys), but not to eat it. Gerritt was a complete opposite & a major sugar bug (one of my favorite names for him), so I had to set the rule of him eating only one piece of candy in the morning & one in the evening.

Sophia is last, but not the least (she got more candy than Gerritt because of her size & cuteness)

Gerritt - the first one at the door

Gerritt loved trick-or-treating so much, he requested to go again upon waking up the next morning. He was slightly disappointed when I told him he had to wait until next year's Halloween. I must admit, I enjoyed trick-or-treating a bit too much myself & would be more than happy to do it again next October. :-)

The Pumpkin Patch

2011-10-30T20:28:00.001-07:00

Today I worked my last nursing shift at the hospital. I had a difficult patient assignment, but luckily my coworkers felt sorry for me & helped out quite a bit. Everyone kept complimenting me on how great I looked being just 3 weeks away from my due date. My last day at Planned Parenthood clinic is November 17th (just 5 days away from my due date). Maybe I've overcommitted myself? Oh, well, baby may always decide to come early.

This week I've attended a continuing education conference for nurse practitioners in downtown Seattle. It was so much fun to run into my former classmates, preceptors & instructors. Two long days of sitting & note taking ensured that I would not have to take any continuing education courses (which are required to maintain my nurse practitioner license) for a while!
By the time Saturday came, all I wanted to do was to stay at home & rest. But then the projected rainy day didn't happen. Instead, Saturday turned out to be sunny & warm. It was a shame to waste such a gorgeous day, so we packed the kids & headed to the Pumpkin Patch at the Dr. Maze's Farm.

I am 36 weeks 5 days pregnant

We last visited this farm when Sophia was just 5 months old, & it was fun to take her back there all grown up. I waddled my way through the farm & even enjoyed gorgeous fall colors & my kids' contageous excitement of running outdoors.

Gerritt & I have really enjoyed the following books for the past few weeks (any book by Mo Willems turned out to be a big hit!):

Bulldog's Big Day by Kate McMullan
Oscar and the Very Hungry Dragon by Ute Krause
I Will Surprise My Friend by Mo Willems
I Am Going! by Mo Willems
My Friend Is Sad by Mo Willems
Don't Let the Pigeon Stay Up Late! by Mo Willems
Don't Let the Pigeon Drive the Bus! by Mo Willems
The Pigeon Finds a Hot Dog! by Mo Willems
Time To Say "Please"! by Mo Willems
Leonardo the Terrible Monster by Mo Willems

Next October we will have another pumpkin patch outing, only with 3 kids!

Preventing Occiput Posterior Baby Positioning

2011-10-27T20:38:00.000-07:00

Left occiput transverse - our baby's current position

Yesterday Shon & I had another appointment with Charlene, our midwife. She determined that the baby was in left occiput transverse position. The good news is that he is head down, but we really don't want him to rotate any more posterior. Like into occiput posterior position - the reason I had my C-section when birthing Gerritt 4 years ago. I still remember the excruciatingly painful back labor (it was worse than the uterine contractions). Plus the occiput posterior baby most likely will lead to a long & exhausting pushing stage & even a possible hospital transfer (yikes!). So... we have another plan in place to prevent another posterior occiput baby.

Occiput posterior position

A posterior occiput baby has its back facing the mother' back & such baby needs to rotate all the way around in order to be born. Posterior occiput babies can't fully flex their heads to help them descend into the birth canal & the diameter of the head is larger than that of an occiput anterior baby (the most desirable birth position). In an anterior position the baby can easily tuck its chin onto its chest to fit through the pelvis.

How can you tell if your baby is in a posterior position?

- You may feel a lot of the baby's movements (punches & kicks) in the front
- Your abdomen may appear flat below your belly button when you are laying down on your back
- Your midwife can tell when she palpates your abdomen in clinic

What makes babies turn posterior?

- Sitting in cars
- Leaning back in comfortable sofas or recliner chairs
- Limited physical activity
- Poor posture
- Crossing one's legs

How can I prevent my baby from being posterior?

- Avoid all reclining positions. You should always sit with your pelvis tilted forward. This can be accomplished by always having your knees below your pelvis & your back straight. Sitting on a birth ball or sitting backwards on a kitchen chair is great.
- Get into the hands-and-knees-position as often as you can. Do it while you watch TV or read a book. Crawling is helpful too (go ahead & scrub the floors on all fours!).
- Do pelvic rocks 10 times in a row 2-5 times a day. Get on your hands & knees & rock your pelvis up & down (alternatively arch your back by tucking your pelvis under & then straightening, like the mad cat pose in yoga).
- Sleep on your left side with your left leg straight & your right leg at a 90-degree angle supported by a pillow or two. This creates a "hammock" for your baby & will encourage the baby to have their back cradled into your tummy.
- Pregnant in the winter? Babies like to have their backs warm. If you are pregnant in the winter & are not wearing a parka that closes in the front, your baby may decide to correct this by turning his back towards yours to stay warm & cozy.

I truly believe if I had followed the above instructions or at least was aware of the concept of optimal fetal positioning, I would have avoided my C-section. In my first pregnancy I had just graduated from the UW Nurse Practitioner program & spent months preceeding Gerritt's birth hunched over in front of the computer studying for my board exam. I hope this information will help someone else.

Additional Resources:

1) The Midwifery Group (the midwifery practice in Vancouver, Canada)

2) The Spinning Babies (a website dedicated to optimal fetal positioning):

a) Occiput posterior (OP)
b) How can I help my baby stay anterior?
c) Myths of occiput posterior

A Pregnant Pumpkin

2011-10-25T22:11:00.000-07:00

Sophia kept saying, "Mommy pumpkin, Daddy pumpkin, baby pumpkin!!! Ha, ha, ha, ha!"

There are only 6 days left until Halloween. Gerritt & I went to Safeway today & picked out 3 gorgeous pumpkins. I originally thought of carving out a spooky witch, a gost or a scary monster, but then remembered this unique carved pumpkin photo by one of my favorite natural/home birth blogging Moms Rixa Freeze from Stand and Deliver. I was inspired!

It took a lot of work, but the end result was worth it!

A pumpkin in honor of my unborn son this Halloween

35 weeks

2011-10-19T06:03:00.000-07:00

36 weeks pregnant

This baby is continuing to train me for the upcoming sleep deprivation by waking me up around 5 am on most days of the week. Usually I get up to use the restroom, then have a snack (I am usually starving early in the mornings), then have a hard time going back to sleep. So I just get up & find something to do.
Luckily, I've had plenty to do lately. With only 5 weeks to go before my due date, it seems the time has accelerated. For example, yesterday (my only day off this week), I started the morning with a meeting with my manager at the hospital to sign my maternity leave paperwork & finish some of the required annual continuing nursing education competencies (chest tube care & epidural pump programming, just to name a few).
Then I rushed to downtown Seattle for a meeting with a lactation consultant at the Birth & Beyond store. With 2 failed attempts at breastfeeding, I have a major anxiety about being unsuccessful again, so I've been in touch with a lactation consultant to prepare as much as it was possible in advance. She looked at my inverted nipples & recommended I rent a hospital-grade pump about a week before my due date. I bought the BPA-free personal use kit & filled out paperwork for a pump rental. The rental for the Medela Symphony will run about $70/month (still cheaper than the cost of formula). We also talked about me using the Medela SoftShells to draw out the inverted nipples, but not until 1-2 weeks before my due date (they can stimulate breasts enough to cause premature labor).
I started my afternoon with a visit to my chiropractor for another spinal adjustment, followed by a pregnancy massage. I've been having more back pain since the start of my 3rd trimester. After finding out that my Aetna health insurance covers chiropractics & massage I decided to give them a try. The only paperwork I had to do was obtaining a massage prescription from my midwife. What a relief! I should have done it sooner. Every pregnant woman deserves to be pumpered with some kind of body work.
It was 3 pm by the time I finished my morning & early afternoon errands. I was starving! After having some lunch at home, I've decided to make the most of a few hours my kids had left with their nanny. I headed to my favorite Value Village (a thrift store) for much needed home birth supply shopping (it's advised to have everything ready by the 36th week of pregnancy). I was very productive & bought many large & medium-sized towels, 2 bed sheets, 2 large pieces of plastic - one for the bed & one to be placed under the birth tub (actually, they were U-Hall plastic mattress protectors), 2 large metal bowls, 2 large cookie sheets with raised edges, a flash light & a gooseneck lamp. I also found a beautiful white sheer bed canopy - got to have the right setting for those postpartum family photos! Of course, I couldn't pass up some other good finds & bought a shoe rack for my closet, almost new pair of Umi shoes for Sophia, 2 large soup bowls, a springform baking pan, a new linen shower curtain liner, & beautiful red Christmas table cloth. I didn't have any trouble falling asleep that night!

Gerritt has discovered another favorite activity - listening to books on CDs

Gerritt pretending to go on a trip (on the evening Shon got back from his business trip)

Sophia learning to eat all by herself

Gerritt dressed himself as a race car driver (including wearing my boots!)

Gerritt has been more irritable lately. The fact that he still sleeps with me is probably to blame. I wake & toss & turn often while trying to find a comfortable position, so his quality of sleep suffers as well. Gerritt has been making great strides in learning Russian. His favorite activity to do after turning off the lights at night is to "practice Russian." I usually name various Russian words (objects in the living room, fruits, vegetables, body parts, colors, etc.) & he translates.
Shon took a recent business trip to San Francisco recently. He was gone for 4 (!) nights. The kids, 2 dogs & I all slept in one king-size bed. It was challenging, but we managed. We were very happy to pick up Daddy at the airport on Friday night. I am grateful Shon doesn't have any more trips planned after the baby's birth.
My Mom's criminal background check is ready, however, I am still waiting for her photos to come in the mail. It looks like she won't make it in time for the baby's birth, but it may not be such a bad thing. The idea of home birth frightens her, so her presence may hinder rather than help my delivery.
I had a OB/GYN VBAC consult at the UW Women's Health Center about a week ago. The doctor told me she thought home birth was dangerous, but at least was nice going about it. We discussed all the VBAC risks involved, & she told me it was my choice at the end. I was dreading the appointment not knowing how I would be received by the provider. I am glad it's behind me.
Good news! My latest platelet count went up from 113K to 146K! My ITP treatment plan must be working. I am that much closer to my dream birth!

My Birth Plan

2011-10-10T14:37:00.000-07:00

Only 31 days to go... I can't postpone writing my birth plan any longer.

I had the first meeting with my doula, Patti Ramos, today. We've discussed my birth plan. Not in great detail since I am not sure how different this labor will be, but enough to cover the most important points. Having already delivered 2 babies, I know exactly what I DON'T want. I had to prepare the home & hospital birth (in case of an emergency transfer) versions. I wanted to get right to the point since there is a running joke among conventional OB providers that "the longer the birth plan, the faster it's to a C-section." I've been postponing this part of the birth preparation long enough...

My Birth Plan for Home

I would like to:

- Walk around freely, stand or squat during contractions
- Eat & drink as desired
- Be disturbed as little as possible & labor in a quiet, dimly-lit environment. I tend to be silent & close my eyes while resting between contractions - it doesn't mean something is wrong.
- Bear down & push spontaneously in an upright position (most likely while kneeling & preferrably in a birthing tub)
- Use counter pressure & controlled pushing to help maintain intact perineum (Please use local anesthesia for any stitches after birth)
- Help "catch" the baby
- Have the baby on my chest immediately after birth & keep it there for observation/Apgar scoring
- Breastfeed the baby as soon as possible
- Leave the umbilical cord unclamped/uncut until placenta is delivered (If the cord is too short, wait until it stops pulsating before cutting it)
- Refrigerate the placenta right away to preserve it for encapsulation
- Decline the newborn antibiotic eye ointment/vitamin K shot
- Skip the newborn bath all together
- Take lots of photos/video during & after birth

My Birth Plan for Hospital

- My delivery is a planned VBAC
- Please treat me with respect & obtain my informed consent before touching me or performing any procedures
- Don't ask me to rate my pain & don't offer any pain medications unless I ask for it first
- When monitoring fetal heart tones, please use intermittent Doppler or a telemetry electronic fetal monitoring to allow for my greater mobility

I would like to:

- Have my husband, doula & midwife present with me during labor & delivery
- Have the hospital staff to be limited to my own doctor & nurses (no residents)
- Walk around freely, stand or squat during contractions
- Eat & drink as desired
- Be disturbed as little as possible & labor in a quiet, dimly-lit environment. I tend to be silent & close my eyes while resting between contractions - it doesn't mean something is wrong. If you need to ask something, please ask my husband, doula or midwife 1st.
- Bear down & push spontaneously in an upright position (most likely while kneeling). Please don't count & stay calm while I am pushing.
- Use counter pressure & controlled pushing to help maintain intact perineum. I prefer having a tear to episiotomy (Please use local anesthesia for any stitches).
- Have the baby on my chest immediately after birth & keep it there for observation/Apgar scoring
- Leave the umbilical cord unclamped/uncut until placenta is delivered (If the cord is too short, wait until it stops pulsating before cutting it)
- Deliver the placenta spontaneously (no pulling on the cord) & refrigerate it right away. I will be taking it home with me for placenta encapsulation (Please see my signed Release of Placenta & Waiver of Liability form).
- Breastfeed the baby as soon as possible

For baby:

- No circumcision
- No newborn antibiotic eye ointment or hepatitis B vaccine
- No vitamin K injection (I will be administering oral vitamin K instead)
- No pacifiers or artificial supplementation of any kind (formula, sugar water) as I plan to breastfeed
- All medical tests/exams to be done in my presence
- Delay baby's first bath until at least 1 hour after birth

My hospital birth plan turned out to be a bit longer than I preferred. I chose my midwife & doula carefully so many of the points outlined in the hospital birth plan didn't have to be spelled out for them. Many parts of the hospital birth plan will not apply in an emergency home birth transfer (I doubt anyone will have the time to read my plan in a true emergency), but it was important for me to cover "all the bases" just in case. One less thing to do on my birth preparation check-off list!

Home Birth Supply List

2011-10-06T21:08:00.000-07:00

We had another appointment with our midwife yesterday where we received a home birth supply list. It's recommended to have these supplies collected & prepared prior to 36 weeks of pregnancy. Although it seems a bit overwhelming at first, for the birth to go smoothly I will likely need most of the items. Also, there is nothing worse than having Shon run to the store for missing supplies in the middle of labor or post-partum when I need him the most.

1) Birth kit
You can probably buy one from your midwife or one of the home birth supply stores on the web (see Your Water Birth or Cascade Healthcare). We bought ours along with the birth tub via the Micronews ad (Microsoft's version of the Craig's List).

Our birth kit contains the following items:

10 - 23x24 underpads (chucks pads)
10 - 23x36 underpads (chucks pads)
2 - 40x72 plastic backed sheets
24 adhesive maternity pads
1 perineal bottle
12 sterile 4x4 gauze packages
15 alcohol prep pads
4 flexible drinking straws
1 paper tape measure
Sterile lubricating jelly
1 cotton baby hat
1 bulb syringe
12 sterile glove singles
1 iodine scrub brush or iodine solution
2 plastic cord clamps
2 stretch briefs
8 oz. herbal sitz bath (made of uva ursi, comfrey leaf, lavender flowers, yarrow flowers & shepherd's purse)
Hand held mirror
25" water hose
Faucet adaptor & "Y"
Water thermometer with a cute plastic rubber duck on top
Debris removal net
Intex Quick-Fill high output electric air pump
Wayne submersible multi-purpose pump
Instructions

The ink-free foot printer & birth certificate were missing, but it's no big deal considering we didn't pay full price for the kit.

2) Birth supplies
Keep them in an easily-accessible clean box or a Rubbermaid bin once gathered & then lay out prior to birth.

- Plastic mattress cover (It may be waterproof mattress cover, old shower curtain, or other large sheet of plastic. You may need to secure the edges of the plastic with duct tape so it doesn't slide around)
- Plastic sheet for under the birth tub (to keep any water dripping from Mom's body from getting onto the floor/carpet)
- 2 sets of old sheets (ones you don't mind getting bloody)
- 1 flannel sheet (to be put into the dryer in late labor with several towels for warming up Mom after birth)
- 6-8 large and several hand towels (ones you don't mind getting bloody)
- 4 or more cotton receiving blankets
- 1 large heating pad & a pillow case to keep it clean (to heat baby blankets & keep the newborn warm)
- 2 large plastic garbage bags for laundry & garbage
- 2 large cookie sheets with raised edges (to hold instruments)
- Hydrogen peroxide (to take blood stains out of sheets/towels)
- Bleach for clean up (I chose to have Clorox disinfecting wipes instead)
- Portable electric heater (to heat the room quickly when birth is approaching)
- Birth tub supplies
- One large hand mirror (to view birth)
- One good quality flashlight ready with batteries
- A good light source (a portable lamp)
- Baby wipes (unscented)
- Paper towels
- 2 gallon-size ziplock bags
- Oral digital thermometer
- 2-3 medium-sized metal bowls
- Crockpot (for warm compresses if planning a land birth)
- Lots of ice in the freezer

3) Supplements/remedies

- Homeopathic Arnica Montana (for pain relief)
- Bach Flower Rescue Remedy (to relieve stress/anxiety during labor)
- Molasses
- Strainer for loose tea
- Unopened small bottle of olive oil (I bought grape seed oil instead)
- Liquid Floradix Iron & Herbs (for blood-building postpartum)
- Lansinoh lanolin cream (for soothing, protecting & healing sore nipples)

4) Food & drink

These must be high-quality, nutritious foods to be eaten by Mom & the labor support team during & after labor.

- Foods for Mom: easily digestible foods such as fruit, yogurt, whole grain toast with nut butter/honey, nutritious proteins (eggs, turkey sausage, string cheese), & juice popsicles during labor
- Hydration for Mom: water, diluted juice (half water, half juice), healthy energy drinks, popsickles, coconut water & Laboraide

Laboraide Recipe:
1/3 cup fresh squeezed lemon juice
1/3 cup honey
1/4 tsp salt
2 crushed calcium tablets (or 1/4 tsp calcium powder)
4 cups of water
(This mixture can be made ahead of time & frozen)
- Foods/snacks for the labor support team. I am thinking roasted unsalted nuts, sliced fruit/vegetables, string cheese, chips with hummus, dark chocolate, lentil soup (cooked in the crockpot) with rustic bread (?).

5) Postpartum supplies

- Maxi pads (for heavy flow)
- Food for the 1st 3 days prepared & ready to cook
- Ice pack (can be made from crushed ice in a plastic glove, use a small bag of frozen peas or a gel pack)
- Witch hazel pads (to be used for any stitches or hemorrhoids after the birth)

6) Rest area for the labor support team (midwife & doula)

In case they need to rest/sleep during labor or before driving home

7) Optional items

- Abdominal binder (to support abdomen after delivery)
- Ingredients for Comfrey Burn Paste (to heal perineum): 8 oz wheat germ oil, 8 oz liquid (not crystallized) honey, 4 oz comfrey leaf powder

I would also add the following items:

- A pair of warm wool socks
- Birthing ball
- Video camera with a charger & extra film
- Digital camera, fully charged
- CD player (to listen to hypnobirthing) & extra batteries
- Essential oils (to be mixed with grapeseed/almond/olive oil for massage during labor). I included Simpler's Clary Sage (relieves tension & increases contractions), Geranium Rose (believed to decrease inflammation & reduce anxiety & stress) & Rose Absolute (antidepressant, softens ligaments).

I am going to be busy!

33 weeks/Alternative Treatment of ITP in Pregnancy

2011-10-05T20:43:00.001-07:00

With my wonderful midwife, Charlene Campbell, LM, CPM (see BirthJoy)

I have only 7 weeks left to enjoy being pregnant. How time flies! I am so used to being uncomfortable, achy & off balance that it's hard to imagine having my body back again.
Shon & I had our 1st midwife appointment together today. We've decided that he needed to be present for the rest of my appointments so he is on board with our home birth plans & can support me to the best of his ability. My midwife was so happy to see him - she was starting to wonder if this was a desired pregnancy. The combination of Shon working standard 8 am to 6 pm 5-day work week made it difficult for him to attend any of my meetings with Charlene. Thankfully, she opened up her evenings for us, so Shon can now join me for my 6:30 pm appointments on Wednesdays.

Gerritt checking out the pregnancy wheel

I didn't feel like he needed to be there in the beginning. I've carried 2 pregnancies to term & being pregnant again was an "old hat" to me. I tend to be an "easy" patient because I accept pregnancy discomforts as part of the game & don't complain much. I didn't need Shon's presence to discuss & validate my nausea, sore breasts & fatigue. Why would anyone want to sit through this relatively "boring" stuff? Plus we needed to pay extra for our nanny to watch the kids.

But everything changed in my 3rd trimester. Suddenly, I became aware of other expecting couples arriving to the appointments together holding hands & I started to feel that I was missing something. I realized that I couldn't & didn't want to do the rest of my prenatal care on my own & desperately needed Shon there. It doesn't matter if it is your 1st or 3rd pregnancy - each child deserves to be celebrated by BOTH parents! We even had Gerritt join us today. Since he's going to be present at the birth, I wanted him to meet Charlene & also be involved in welcoming his little brother into the world.

My latest craving - kombucha tea (to learn more about Kombucha Wonder Drink go here)

My platelet count dropped from 168K to 113K 2 weeks ago, so Charlene & I discussed our plan to build up my platelets. I developed idiopathic thrombocytopenia a lot sooner in my past pregnancies, so actually it's pretty good for me to drop only in the 31st week of pregnancy this time. My platelet counts in previous pregnancies always stayed above 80K, however, Charlene would be more comfortable doing a home birth with a platelet count > 100K, so I had to committ to the following treatment plan:

1) Drink 1 "green" drink daily.
I use Perfect Food Super Green Formula powder by the Garden of Life. This formula is made with vegetable, sprout & organic cereal grass ingredients & probiotics. One serving is equivalent to 140 grams of fresh grass juice to support digestion & healthy immune function.

2) Decrease amount of physical exertion & get more rest ("Have more energy coming in than out").

3) Take 1 drop of vitamin K twice daily.
Charlene recommended the K-Quinone vitamin K supplement distributed by the Scientific Botanicals, Inc. (Mukilteo, WA). 1 drop equals 2 mg of vitamin K-1 (as Phytonadione). Also, I bought a vitamin K2 supplement from Dr. Mercola's website. 1 capsule equals 150 mcg of vitamin K2 (as Menaquinone-7). Vitamin K2 is called the new miracle nutrient by the natural health community (similar to the relatively recently discovered health benefits of vitamin D). To learn more about benefits of vitamin K2, go here.

4) Increase my protein intake to 100-120 grams/day.
It's a good thing I am hungry all the time & crave mostly red meat. It's not unusual for me to eat meatballs for breakfast, turkey sausage for lunch & steak for dinner.

5) Take digestive enzymes with all my meals.
I use the Raw Enzymes Women by the Garden of Life. This supplement contains a variety of protein-, carbohydrate- & fat-digesting enzymes.

6) Drink 2 cups of nettle/red raspberry leaf/alfalfa/oatstraw tea a day (a combination of 1 part nettle leaf, 1 part red raspberry leaf, 1/2 part alfalfa leaf, & 1/2 part oatstraw). I have listed the benefits of individual herbs in my previous post.

I love how holistic midwifery is! This is definitely not an advice you would get from a conventional OB/GYN, although you also have to be careful to avoid choosing a "medwife" as your provider. The standard medical treatment of idiopathic thrombocytopenia purpura (ITP) in pregnancy includes steroids (oral prednisone), but only for platelet counts < 50K. The greatest concern for ITP during pregnancy is the risk of thrombocytopenia in the newborn (although only about 5% of newborns have a platelet count < 50K). Prednisone given for several weeks before delivery does not affect the fetal platelet count, so treatment should be given only if indicated for mother's thrombocytopenia.
The platelet counts of infants born to mothers with ITP may decrease sharply during several days after birth, so serial platelet counts are recommended in the newborn period. Even when severe thrombocytopenia occurs, bleeding problems are almost always mild & can be treated effectively.
Current recommendations include managing the delivery in a conventional manner & with Cesarean delivery performed only for obstetrical indications. Epidural anesthesia is appropriate for maternal platelet counts above 80-100K (depending on anesthesiologist's preference & comfort level).

Gerritt said a few funny things recently, so I had to write them down:

"I love you 10 times, Mommy!" (Gerritt explaining how much he loves me)
"Can we blow more candles out? That's a favorite part of my birthday."
"I am going to turn into ice & freeze the whole bed!" (while refusing to go to sleep by taking off his bed covers)

Here are a few photos of Gerritt & Sophia. A picture is worth a thousand words, right?

Gerritt, Sophia & their friend Anna are driving the imaginary bus

The rainy season began in Seattle, & Gerritt can never resist jumping into a water puddle

Sophia loves puddles too!

Gerritt & his friend Anna are enjoying a walk in the rain

Gerritt & Sophia pretend to swim like fish when taking a bath

Sophia has officially moved to cosleeping with Daddy (She now uses her crib only for naps in the daytime. Coincidentally, Gerritt started cosleeping with me shortly after turning 2 as well.)

Gerritt & his friend Anna playing dress-up

I still have so much to do! I have an appointment for a chiropractor evaluation & massage for my back pain & my 1st meeting with doula next week. The countdown begins!

Happy 4th birthday, Gerritt!

2011-10-01T20:20:00.001-07:00

Four years ago our lives were changed forever when we became parents for the first time. After a difficult labor (natural birth turned into an unexpected C-section) Gerritt was born. Shon & I were both only children & were not exposed to a lot of children as adults. I only remember rolling my eyes while observing a toddler temper tantrum at the grocery store, "I will have better control of my kids!" Gerritt didn't come with a set of instructions & had a challenging task of teaching us how to take care of him. There were many sleepless nights & difficulties along the way, but Gerritt helped us to become a true family. He also paved the way for Sophia & his little brother. Becoming his parents brought us so much joy, we simply couldn't stop at having one child! :-)

Pancake & sausage breakfast with uncle Ananth & family

Gerritt's 4th birthday morning began with a surprise visit from uncle Ananth (our dear friend & Gerritt's godfather).

1st present (Cars-2 movie play set) was opened right after

Shon & I & Ananth shared in the cost of one of Gerritt's birthday presents - the Cars-2 movie play set (a racing track & 4 various cars).

Time to blow out the birthday candles!

Gerritt & I made the chocolate cake the night before, but I will not be publishing the recipe until it's perfected. :-) I bought the sunflowers & the balloons also the day prior to make Gerritt's birthday morning more special.

Opening presents from grandma Chris & grandpa Gerry

Gerritt's American grandparents joined us later in the afternoon & more present opening followed. Since Gerritt is in love with all kinds of super heroes, the remote-controlled Captain America on a motorcycle turned out to be a big hit. He also got the Captain America shield from Daddy & Dr. Seuss's Twister game from Chris & Gerry.

Playing the Twister game later in the evening

Running with the balloons is so much fun!

Sophia's turn!

Our neighbor Rinku & her son Yash surprised Gerritt by stopping by in the evening with several more presents including a leggo set & the Cars movie pajamas.

Birthday photo with Mom & Dad (Sophia was taking a nap)

Happy birthday, Gerritt! You are truly a special boy!

A different kind of busy

2011-09-21T21:45:00.000-07:00

I have been busy working on my Mom's immigration paperwork for the past few weeks. I feel like my kids are a bit neglected & watch way too much TV. They definitely spend more time than I would like on their Android tablets. Oh, well... If my Mom makes it here on time for my birth, it will be well worth it. We have not hired an attorney, so I am it. I have to read & re-read various form instructions multiple times to get it just right. I did my own U. S. citizenship paperwork, so I have confidence I can do it. But it sure takes a lot of time.
For example, today I have finally mailed the first required set of documents to the National Visa Center. The documents required included:

1) Employment verification letters for both Shon & I.
2) Copies of our tax return & W-2 forms for 2010.
3) A lengthy I-864 form (Affidavit of Support). I had to research my exact INDIVIDUAL income for the past 3 years (tough to do when you've filed a joint tax return with your spouse).
4) Another slightly shorter, but no less complicated form I-864A (Contract Between Sponsor (me) & Household Member (Shon)) since we are using both of our combined incomes to qualify for sponsorship of my Mom.

Here is some other information I had to get my hands on recently:

- My parents' certificates of marriage & divorce
- My mother's parents' birth & death certificates
- Certificates of birth & death of my deceased brother
- All the places my Mom has lived for at least 6 months starting at age 16
- All the places my Mom has worked for the past 10 years
- All of the educational institutions she has attended (with dates & institutions' addresses)
- All of my Mom's visits to the US (about 7 of them with exact dates)
- All of immunizations my Mom has had up to now & the ones still required (per CDC's recommendations) for her age group
- My Mom's military records & rank achieved

My Mom also has to undergo a lengthy criminal background check (which takes a month to a month-and-a-half). All of the above-mentioned original documents have to be photocopied & then translated from Russian into English. Then they must be certified as legitimate translations.

I am literally burried by the mountain of paperwork! By the way, all of the form instructions mention the Paperwork Reduction Act passed a few years ago, so I can imagine how much more complicated this process used to be.

31 weeks

2011-09-21T02:48:00.001-07:00

I have started to have a familiar pain on the right side of my rib cage (this baby is all on the right, just like Gerritt & Sophia were) from baby's kicks & stretches. He is growing big time, & I am constantly hungry. I can hardly believe that my abdomen has grown that much bigger. Just 2 months to go! In one respect, it seems like far away, but I know it will fly by quickly.
I've decided not to go back for my 2 recommended ultrasounds (one for cervical length check, another one to check on baby's growth). I just feel like they are completely unnecessary. My main concern was placenta previa, & now that it has resolved, I feel like the other 2 ultrasounds were advised mostly due to the US practice of defensive medicine (a doctor is afraid to miss something) & to generate more business ("your baby's belly is on the small side," common!). The perinatologist even asked me if I was gaining appropriate amount of weight. Believe me, it's not a problem now. I can tell how much my son has grown since it's so much harder for me to bend over & almost impossible to put on my shoes. I've already had 2 ultrasounds & would rather not expose my baby to more ultrasound waves (even though it's considered relatively safe, I am very conservative when it comes to unnecessary medical interventions).
Plus, based on all my research, I've come to a conclusion that cervical length is a poor predictor of likelihood of preterm labor in low-risk women (in the absence of other risk factors such as, for example, previous preterm birth, LEEP procedure (where part of cervix is removed due to precancerous cervical cells), bacterial vaginosis, diabetes, hypertension, increased stress, etc.). In low-risk women (such as myself) the sensitivity of cervical length measurement is decreased & the false positive rate is increased. One article even stated, "In order to improve the positive predictive value of a cervical length measurement in low-risk women, a length of 1.5 cm rather than 2.5 cm should be considered too short." So, there!
My sleep is more disturbed than ever. I toss & turn probably at least every 2 hours, often waking up Gerritt. He has been more grumpy in the mornings because of that, & even though I offered to move him to his own bed, he has been stubbornly refusing. I've started to wake up at 4 or 4:50 am & not being able to get back to sleep. In addition to having to empty my bladder more often, I also have uncomfortable pubic & bilateral hip pain. If I lay on my back, I feel like I am suffocating, but if I lay on my side for too long, my hip is killing me.
I am still trying to find an OB/GYN who would do my VBAC consult. The purpose of the consult is to be fully informed of the VBAC risks (such as uterine rupture) & also to establish care in case of a hospital transfer. Of course, I am already well informed, so this is just another formality. I was referred to a female doctor at Salish Women's Health a couple of weeks ago, but then had to cancel when she decided not to do VBAC consults any more. The whole situation is very political, & many OB/GYNs do not want to get involved with midwives, especially the ones doing HOME VBACs, which they consider unsafe. So I have a tentative VBAC consult appointment with a different OB/GYN at UW in October, but she wanted to see my medical records first.
I am still working. In Russia, Canada & most of Europe women have the option to start their maternity leave in their 8th month of pregnancy. Unfortunately, not so in the US. I will probably be working until the very end thanks to poor maternity welfare system in the US. If I start my maternity leave now, I will have almost nothing left for after the birth. Actually, it's not such a bad thing for me since my job at the clinic is mostly sedentary. My physically demanding work as a hospital bedside acute care nurse only happens once a week & sometimes, as per diem employee, I get cancelled. Also, I like to keep busy!
I still haven't met my doula Patti Ramos (she had to cancel several times due to her clients going into labor), & I have a meeting set up with her in a couple of weeks. I don't really care when we meet as long as she makes it for my birth.

Gerritt & Sophia riding a car at the mall

Sophia discovered a way to combine drinking apple juice & milk

Gerritt & Sophia's favorite game - making a "cake" & then taking turns jumping on top of it ("cake" is made of pillows & blankets)

Kids fascinated with the spinning dinosaur top

Gerritt displaying his favorite toys - the Transformers, the Thor hammer & the Spiderman helicopter

"I am a turtle, Mommy!" (Sophia after strapping a diaper changing pad to her back)

Sophia has started to climb out of her crib regularly. Often, when she wakes up in the morning, she'll get out & then stand by the bedroom door pulling on the door knob. I was pretty shocked finding her there for the 1st time, but now it has become routine. Sometimes she climbs out of the crib during the night, simply because she wants to snuggle with Daddy.
We've finally stopped buying formula for her. She still likes her bottle about twice a day, "I want my milky!", but we now give her only organic whole milk. She doesn't need the formula anymore from the nutritional standpoint (she is an excellent eater & has a mouthful of teeth). More importantly, I want to get formula & bottles out of sight so I don't give up too soon when I am struggling to learn breastfeeding my newborn son in a sleep-deprived, zombi-like state. I am actually not concerned about the delivery part as much as attempting breastfeeding again. Maybe the 3rd time will be the charm?

Apple Quinoa Muffins

2011-09-20T08:15:00.000-07:00

This muffins are light, fluffy & nutritious. Sour cranberries contrast nicely with sweet raisins.

Ingredients:

2 sticks unsalted butter, softened to room temperature
1 cup sugar
2 eggs, at room temperature
1 1/2 teaspoon vanilla extract
1 cup all-purpose flour
1 cup quinoa flour
1 teaspoon baking powder
1 teaspoon salt
1 apple, cored & diced
1/4 cup raisins, chopped
1/2 cup fresh or frozen cranberries, chopped

1) Preheat oven to 375 degrees. Grease the muffin tins & line with paper cups.
2) Mix butter & sugar until the mixture is light & fluffy. Mix in eggs & vanilla.
3) In a separate bowl, combine flours, baking powder & salt. Gradually combine the wet & dry mixtures together. Chop apple, raisins & cranberries using the food processor. Fold in the fruits into the muffin batter.
4) Spoon into the muffin cups using more or less batter depending on the desired muffin size. Place the muffin tin into the oven & cook for 25", or until the muffins are a rich golden color & a wooden stick inserted into the center comes out clean. Cool for 30" & serve. Store in the refrigerator for up to a week.

Notes:
Quinoa is one of the oldest cultivated grains in the world. It is also the most nutritious. It is high in protein, calcium & iron. Quinoa flour can be substituted for half of the all-purpose flour in many recipes or completely replace wheat flour in cake & cookie recipes.
My favorite butter to use for baking (& eating on top of toast or baked potato) is the Kerrygold butter. They happened to carry it in our Trader Joe's nearby. This butter is made from "summer milk" of grass-fed cows in Ireland. It is soft & spreadable, with a naturally deep gold color.

Strawberry Banana Bread

2011-09-19T21:05:00.000-07:00

I am not sure what it is about reaching the 3rd trimester of pregnancy, but all I want to do is bake! Nothing says "fall is here" like the delicious aroma of freshly baked banana bread. This recipe is a variation of the traditional banana bread. Strawberries add a surprisingly unique & delicate flavor to the predominant flavor of bananas.

Ingredients:

1 stick unsalted butter, softened to room temperature
3 ripe bananas (the riper, the better)
1 cup sliced fresh strawberries
3/4 cups sugar
1/2 teaspoon baking soda
1 1/2 teaspoon baking powder
1/2 teaspoon salt
2 eggs
1 1/2 cups all-purpose flour
1 teaspoon vanilla extract
1/2 cup chopped walnuts

Preheat oven to 350 degrees. Mash up bananas in a large mixing bowl. Add butter, sugar, eggs & vanilla. Mix well. In a separate bowl, mix together flour, salt, baking soda & baking powder. Combine wet & dry ingredients & mix again. Fold in sliced strawberries & walnuts.
Grease a loaf pan with nontick spray or butter. Pour batter into loaf pan. Bake at 350 degrees until golden brown & bread passes toothpick test, 50-60." This bread tastes the best when slightly warmed.

Blackberry & Apple Crumble

2011-09-13T15:54:00.000-07:00

This recipe was inspired by our trip to the Grass Lawn Park today. I took the kids outside for some much-needed fresh air & exercise. On our way back to the car, we discovered a large patch of blackberry bushes just breaming with juicy ripe berries. Most of the berries went straight into the kids' mouths, but the rest were saved in a plastic sand castle mold we brought along. I also happened to have a box of Ginger Gold apples bought on a trip to Wenatchee to visit grandma Chris & grandpa Gerry this weekend (just Gerritt & I). A dessert combining both apples & blackberries seemed like a perfect end-of-summer recipe.

Ingredients:
3/4 cups all-purpose flour
1 cup rolled oats
2 Tbsp light brown sugar
1/2 cup softened unsalted butter
1 1/2 teaspoon baking powder
1/4 cup whole milk
1/2 teaspoon salt
1 egg, lightly beaten

Filling:
3 cup gently washed blackberries
3 medium-sized apples with peel on, sliced
2 Tbsp corn starch
1/2 cup light brown sugar (add 3/4 cup if using sour apples)
Juice of 1/2 lemon
1/4 teaspoon of cinnamon

1) Preheat oven to 350 degrees F.
2) In a large bowl, combine the filling ingredients - blackberries, apples, corn starch, sugar, lemon juice, & cinnamon. Mix well. Place fruit mixture in a 2-quart casserole.
3) In a medium bowl, combine flour, oats, brown sugar, butter & baking powder. Mix with a fork until the mixture resembles coarse crumbs. Stir in the milk & egg until just moistened.
4) Drop batter on fruit. Bake in the oven for 35 minutes or until the crumble topping is golden brown & the fruit is soft & bubbling beneath.

Serve warm with ice cream on top.

A few photos from our trip to Wenatchee:

At the Smallwood's Harvest Farm near Wenatchee

Gerritt fell in love with Katie (a large cat that lives inside the Smallwood's Harvest Farm store)

Gerritt shopping with his "Boppy"(the name he gave to his toy puppy)

Posing with the rooster

Swimming with grandma Chris

Another stop at the Farm on the way back home

Gerritt did a great job taking this photo of me with the sunflowers

Beauty of a sunflower

Upside Down Plum Cake

2011-09-06T19:37:00.001-07:00

My last 2 baking adventures didn't turn out well. Last week I've attempted to make glutein-free pumpking pancakes, & a few days ago I tried to make muffins. Both of the recipes flopped - the pancakes & muffins failed to rise, turning out heavy & underbaked. Little did I know that baking powder & baking soda expire. Apparently, the baking powder I was using was more than 4 years old (!).
This weekend Shon & the kids visited Korean grandma, & he brought home a large bag of red plums. Last time we got plums, many of them rotted & had to be thrown away because we just couldn't eat them fast enough. This time, I wanted to put the plums to a good use. Despite being so discouraged last week, I stocked up on new baking powder this morning & decided to give baking another go.
The plum cake didn't disappoint. It turned out light, moist & not overly sweet. Plus, I loved the presentation! The cake is best served at room temperature, topped off with whipping cream.

Ingredients:
3 eggs
1/2 cup unsalted butter, softened
1/2 cup sugar
1 Tbsp vanilla extract
1 cup all-purpose flour
1/2 teaspoon baking powder
1 1/4 cups plums, pitted & sliced

Directions:
1) Preheat oven to 375 degrees F. Grease & flour one 9-inch round baking pan.
2) Separate the eggs. In a small bowl, beat the egg whites until stiff peaks form & set aside.
3) In a larger bowl, cream the butter & sugar. Beat in the egg yolks & vanilla extract.
4) Stir together the flour & baking powder & then beat the flour mixture into the creamed mixture. Gently fold in the egg whites.
5) Arrange the plums in an attractive pattern on the bottom of the baking pan. Spread the batter evenly on top of the plums.
6) Bake at 375 degrees for 30-35." When transferring the cake to a cooling rack, turn it upside down, so the plums are on the top. Cool before serving.

28 weeks

2011-08-30T16:06:00.000-07:00

Last weekend Shon & I had another date night, more exactly date morning. We dropped off the kids at Mrs. Anna's house around 9 am on Sunday & went to see the "Art in the Garden" exhibit at the Bellevue Botanical Gardens. I originally wanted to hike the Snoqualmie Falls, but with Shon's encouragement (who thought I was way too ambitious for the 3rd trimester of pregnancy) changed our more physically demanding hike to a leisurely walk in the Gardens. It was a good decision since, unfortunately, I got tired fairly quickly. We finished the date with a lunch at the Cheesecake Factory.

Posing with some of the art exhibits

I am officially done with the "easy" 2nd trimester. Now the all too familiar back pain, sleepless nights & fatigue are back again. I am up to 4 pillows for sleeping. The hardest part is getting up twice a night to use the bathroom & then not being able to fall back asleep. I'll be up with the baby soon enough & it just doesn't seem fair not to get my rest now. The hot weather has been especially difficult causing considerable ankle swelling & more insomnia. I have to start seeing my midwife every 2 weeks now (I honestly wish I could skip such frequent visits, but those are the medical guidelines). It's harder to find clothes that fit well & I'll probably be wearing the same pair of pants & a couple of shirts for work for the rest of the pregnancy. My feet are definitely bigger & I have to wear shoes that are half a size or even one size larger than usual.
I am in the midst of doing all the immigration paperwork for my Mom to move to the US. We filed the paperwork in March & got approved at the end of July. If we move quickly enough, there is hope she'll make it here for the baby's birth. Most of the work now has to be done on her end & involves being current on immunizations, a detailed medical exam, undergoing a criminal background check (which takes about 1 month) & submitting a huge stack of documents (including the original, a copy & a translation).

Attempting to capture some of the outdoor's beauty

The baby must be gaining weight since I've been craving rich foods. I've recently switched from low-fat products to full-fat milk & cheese & even started to eat butter(!). Most of the traditional pregnancy-related websites & magazines encourage maintaining a low-fat diet, yet some alternative practitioners state a diet rich in full fat foods from healthy sources is beneficial (e.g., organic full-fat dairy, organic grass-fed meats & coconut oil), especially in pregnancy. The growing baby's brain is composed mostly of cholesterol so it's essential to consume adequate amounts.
Homeopathy practitioner Joette Calabrese from HomeopathyWorks.net recently wrote about good fats vs. fake fats in her August newsletter, & about the commonly accepted notion of saturated fats & cholesterol causing heart disease being completely wrong. One of my favorite online health experts, Dr. Mercola, even wrote a recent article, "The Forbidden Food You Should Never Stop Eating," outlining all the benefits of saturated fats in one's diet.
Personally, my well being has much improved since adding some fat to my diet. I still remember when about 10 years ago I went to a naturopath complaining of lethargy, depression, angry mood swings & feeling cold often. I was following a strict low-fat diet & replaced all my dairy with soy products. My cholesterol levels came back BELOW normal. The moral of the story is that we all need cholesterol to maintain healthy hormone levels & produce sufficient serotonin to feel happy.

One of my favorite things to eat for lunch lately is bacon, avocado & tomato sandwich. Just spread Vegenaise on toasted slices of rustic whole grain bread. Top the bread with avocado, tomatoes, & crispy bacon slices (I really like Trader Joe's Uncured Apple Smoked Bacon).

Strawberries topped off with organic whipped cream make a perfect desert (mind you, I normally don't eat like this & my cravings surprise even me).

I had my 28-week OB ultrasound & good news - my placenta moved away from the cervix! Green light for home birth! The baby is head down & growing well (over 2 lbs). Of course, I couldn't get off easy. My cervix is shorter than usual - 2.4 cm to be exact (the ideal length is between 3-4 cm). If it gets any shorter I'll be at higher risk for preterm delivery. Perinatologist & I did a thoroughly chart review & it turned out I had the same "problem" while pregnant with Sophia. My cervix length was 2.1 cm at 29 weeks & that didn't stop me from carrying her to 40 weeks 2 days.

The little guy's 3D image (this is the best ultrasonographer could do since he kept his hand in front of his face the whole time)

It looks like he inherited my long nose!

So more appointments for me - a repeat cervix check in 1 week & another complete OB ultrasound in 3 weeks (due to baby's abdomen diameter being in the 5th percentile, or smaller than expected). That's on top of my regular midwife appointments & an OB/GYN doctor consult for VBAC (vaginal birth after Cesarean) (another formality to be fully cleared for home birth). Did I already mention how much I don't like going to the doctors?

Sophia taking a nap with her favorite kitties (I couldn't help photographing her - she looks so precious when sleeping!)

Gerritt & I have discovered a few more favorite books at our library:

Bad Boys Get Cookie! by M. Palatini & H. Cole
Superman: The Story of the Man of Steel by Ralph Cosentino
Dora Saves the Snow Princess by Phoebe Beinstein
Don't Be Silly, Mrs. Millie! by Judy Cox
The Red Hen by Rebecca & Ed Emberley
That's What Leprechauns Do by Eve Bunting
Where's Kitty? (a lift-the-flap book) by Mercer Mayer

My 16-year Anniversary Of The Arrival To The US

2011-08-25T22:02:00.000-07:00

August 25, 1995 (My first day in the US. Lunch at the Floyd's Place in Seattle, a couple of hours after getting off the airplane)

August 25th marked the 16th anniversary of my arrival to the US. I set my foot on the American soil on August 25th of 1995 & met the people who changed my life, Chris & Gerry Ailts, at Lake Chelan over the Labor Day weekend. No one would have predicted that my temporary 3-month stay at their house would stretch to 5 years, or that I, with my limited English, would go on to graduate from a nursing program & get my Registered Nurse license.

At the Chelan County Fair (during my 1st week in the US)

The Ailts were unique because they didn't have children of their own, they've never participated in hosting an exchange student before and, most importantly, they've never treated me as one. I immediately became a member of their family. They shared their home, lives & hearts with me, not expecting anything in return.
I was a shy, scared & lonely teenager. As an only child, I was sheltered from life & didn't have experience making any kinds of decisions for myself. I couldn't budget money & went through $1000 given to me by my Mom (to be spent over 1 year) in about 1 month. I didn't know what my favorite color was & wore only black for a while (I thought it was classy). I couldn't decide what kinds of foods I liked & once ate a large rare steak just to be polite. I didn't smile much & when I did, I covered my mouth due to my poor dental health.

November 11, 1995 (Visiting San Francisco - my first trip with Chris & Gerry & one of many more to come)

I consider my move to the US to be one of the best things that have ever happened to me. This country became a wonderful place to grow up, to be liberated & to find myself. Mostly because I moved far away from my intensely loving, but very controlling Mom. My first act of rebellion was getting a perm (which I wasn't allowed to do growing up). I went through a period of changing my hair & clothes styles as often as I changed my boyfriends - about every 3 months. I still admire Chris & Gerry's wisdom & courage not to interfere & let me figure things out on my own.

June 8, 2000 (RN program graduation ceremony)

Finding myself & building a life in the US was a gradual process. I studied hard & held a variety of cash-only jobs such as babysitting, gardening, taking care of elderly, painting, & house cleaning. They paid for my out-of-state college tuition, which was quite expensive even though I was studying at a small local junior college. I renounced everything Russian & made it my goal to assimilate into the American society as much as I could (I am just starting to get back to my Russian roots now & becoming a parent was my biggest motivator). I observed, listened & learned. By the end of my 1st year in the US I was able to understand the American jokes & even strike back.
I fell in love with America. It's hard to describe everything I like about my new home, but a few things stand out:

- I like visiting or calling an office & getting a friendly & helpful response to my questions.
- I like seeing friendly faces & getting smiles from complete strangers many places I go.
- I like being able to achieve anything through perseverance & hard work without having the right connections, lots of money, or being a city mayor's daughter.
- I can dress & behave any way I like without worrying about what other people may think or say.
- I have the freedom to pursue chosen by me lifestyle without being considered an outcast or an anarchist (including marrying a man from a different race & having a homebirth).
- I have faith in my future & enjoy relative stability instead of having to constantly worry about tomorrow (I didn't realize I had chronic anxiety until I lived in the US for a few months).
- I love the melting pot of cultures living together in harmony. I let go of my judgement of people based on their nationality or religion, & I really don't care if someone is from Ukraine, Uzbekistan or a Jew.
- One can get things done relatively quickly without much red tape & bureaucracy.
- I like being able to try clothes on before buying them & return them to the store if I change my mind.
- I loved being able to afford my own condo & a car just 3 years after graduating from college.
- I like having fresh air to breathe instead of suffocating in diesel & second-hand tobacco smoke fumes at every turn.
- I like going to beautiful & well-maintained parks that are completely free & knowing that they will not be trashed.
- I love being able to purchase foods & products required to maintain a healthy lifestyle.

I have gone back to Russia only once since leaving, exactly 10 years later, in August of 2005. Shon & I decided to spend our honeymoon there. It wasn't much of a vacation, & I don't have any desire to go back (unless I really need another reminder of how fortunate I am). Perhaps the children & I will visit Russia some day once they are teenagers & able to fully appreciate the differences between the US & Russian societies.

Remlinger Farms - part 2

2011-08-24T18:59:00.000-07:00

Gerritt at the entrance to the Farm

Of course, one visit to the Remlinger Farms wasn't enough. So the next time I had a day off during the week, Gerritt & I set out to discover the previously unexplored areas of the Farm. Sophia stayed at home with her nanny Irina, & the freedom of traveling with just one child was heavenly.

The carousel ride (almost empty)

The decision to visit the Farm during the week turned out to be a good one. There were no long lines of people waiting for the rides. Even though the day was warm again (in the 80s), the fact that we didn't have to wait made it that much more pleasant. We even went for many of the rides twice!

Gerritt loved exploring the fire truck

Gerritt absolutely loved exploring the fire truck! He went inside it, climbed on top of it & behind it. I was thinking the bright red color of the truck would be a perfect location for a fall photo shoot.

The Antique Car ride

On the train ride

We went on our favorite train ride again. The train was half empty & we sat not too far from the train conductor's cabin allowing us a good view of the steam coming out of the smokestack.

Last time Gerritt couldn't play with the sprinkler because he didn't have his swimming shorts. This time, we were well prepared. He really enjoyed getting completely wet on a hot summer day.

Gerritt's turn to enjoy the sprinkler

Unfortunately, the Farm serves only junk food (hot dogs, pizza, artificially colored soft drinks & ice cream, hamburgers, french fries, etc.). The growing baby inside me & a toddler require more nutritious foods than that so we brought our own food from home against the rules. But as far as we were concerned that was the only minus. The Farm is now definitely one of our favorite places to visit! Another unfortunate event was loosing Gerritt's stuffed puppy somewhere (the one I had to drive & pick up after forgetting it at daycare because Gerritt wouldn't sleep without it). We went back to all of the places we visited twice, but couldn't find it. Thankfully, Gerritt was able to be appeased by a new puppy I bought for him at the Farm gift store for a whooping $15 (!). He immediately named it Nemo.

Ailts' Seafood & Pesto Angel Hair Pasta

2011-08-21T19:23:00.000-07:00

This is one of my favorite pasta recipes. I give credit to my American parents, Chris & Gerry Ailts, who created this delicious dish & made it almost every weekend while I lived with them for almost 5 years after first moving to the US from Russia. If you have the time, this pasta tastes amazing with homemade pesto - a traditional Italian sauce consisting of crushed garlic, basil & pine nuts blended with olive oil & Parmigiano Reggiano cheese. I made this recipe using the ingredients found in Trader Joe's - grocery store I shop most often.

Ingredients:

1/2 large onion, chopped
1 large carrot, grated or chopped
2 large cloves of garlic, crushed
1/2 of yellow pepper, diced
1/2 of red pepper, diced
4-5 small white or Shiitake mushrooms, thinly sliced
2-3 Tbsp extra virgin olive oil
One 12 oz bag of Trader Joe's frozen Langostino Tails or shrimp, defrosted
One 1 lb bag of Trader Joe's frozen Wild Jumbo Scallops, defrosted
1 lb of Trader Joe's Italian Capellini ("angel hair" pasta)
6.7 oz (1 jar) of Trader Giotto's Pesto alla Genovese (basil pesto)
Half of 8.5-oz jar (or more to taste) of Trader Joe's Sun Dried Tomatoes in olive oil
Shaved Parmigiano Reggiano cheese to taste

Bring salted water to a boil in a large pot. In the meantime, saute onion, carrots, garlic, yellow/red peppers, mushrooms & sun dried tomatoes in olive oil for about 5" on medium heat. Add shrimp & scallops & saute 5-10" more until seafood turns opaque color, but is not overcooked. Take the sauteing pan off the heat & mix vegetables & seafood with pesto sauce (in order to preserve the delicate flavor of pesto sauce it should not be cooked). Set aside until angel hair pasta is ready (cook according to the time length recommended on the package). Add cooked pasta to the vegetable/seafood/pesto mixture & gently coat with pesto sauce. Serve with shaved Parmigiano Reggiano cheese on top.
My American family usually serves this recipe with a green salad & whole-grain rustic bread with extra virgin olive oil & balsamic vinegar on the side.

Remlinger Farms

2011-08-20T17:09:00.000-07:00

After spending last weekend not doing anything special (both my Shon & I had busy & tiring work week), I told him it's imperative we do at least one fun outing every weekend. With only 3 months to go before our new son arrives (he is due at the end of November, just when the annual rain & darkness set in again in Seattle) there will be many months of being cooped up indoors. I doubt I'll be brave enough to go out with 3 kids by myself, although I am capable of anything if I get bored or desperate enough...
So yesterday my husband & I had a date night - our first one since our wedding anniversary in June. I happened to crave Korean cousine, so we had a fabulous dinner at the Seoul Hot Pot. It consisted of barbequed Korean ribs & sauteed squid with seasoned vegetables with multiple little appetizers of seaweed salad, fermented beans, kim chi, soybean sprouts, & pickled vegetables. We took Gerritt & Sophia to their new favorite babysitter Anna who we found while our regular nanny Irina was gone to Russia for vacation. She lives only 5" away from our house & for only $10/hour for both kids, is well worth the money. When we tried date nights in the past, it was such a chore with Gerritt crying & insisting on coming with us. However, he LOVES Mrs. Anna, so when I said that Mommy & Daddy were going out by themselves & he & Sophia would go to Mrs. Anna, to my big relief, he quickly put on his socks & shoes & ran to the door saying, "I am ready, Mommy!"

Water canoe ride

Today we went to the Remlinger Farms - a fun place I've read & heard about way too many times not to visit. Every time I heard another rave review, I felt like I was missing being a part of something big & exciting. So finally, we braved the heat (it was in the 80s today) & the crowds & visited the Farms. No question, it beat our previously favorite Kelsey Creek Farm Park. Due to exhausting heat, the nature of my condition & 2 toddlers who still needed their daily naps, we probably only toured 1/3 of the Farm's amenities.

Gerritt on his 1st pony ride

Riding the train

As soon as Gerritt found out there were live pony rides available, he announced he wanted to go there first. The best part of the pony ride for me was seeing his face light up with a big smile (thanks, Bumbleberry!). The water canoe ride followed (it turned out to be Sophia's favorite). Then we boarded the Tolt River Railroad Steam Train, which was a big hit with all of us. While Sophia & Daddy visited the Animal Barnyard where she could see & pet goats, pigs, cows, alpaca, sheep, bunnies & donkeys, Gerritt rode the Swing Carousel.

Mommy & Sophia on the Flying Pumpkin ride

Sophia cooling off with the water sprinkler!

After having some lunch & listening in on the show at the Farm Theater, we headed to the Flying Pumpkin Ride. After the ride we decided to get some rest in the shade, while Sophia enjoyed playing with the sprinkler. I watched her beautiful dress & hair get completely soaked and ... I just let her. I had a change of clothes in the diaper bag, & it probably felt wonderful. She sure got a lot of smiles from people walking by. :-) After changing Sophia into dry clothes we finished our trip with the Antique Car ride.

The Antique Car ride

Despite my fatigue & swollen ankles, this was one of my favorite outings of the summer! Gerritt & I made a decision to come back again, just the two of us, to explore the rest of the farm (U-pick berries, the Ice Cream shop, & more rides, of course). We'll definitely be back for the Fall Harvest Festival! Just 20" away from our house & with the admission price of $11 per person, Remlinger Farms is a perfect family outing.
Later in the evening, Shon was talking about continuing with our weekend going-out theme & watching the concert at the Crossroads Mall, but even I reached my limit. After having dinner & bathing the kids, we all promptly went to bed at 8:30 pm. :-)

25 weeks

2011-08-14T16:33:00.001-07:00

25 weeks 3 days

I am now more than halfway through my pregnancy. I wish people would stop asking me if I am sure of my dates since, apparently, I look bigger than 25 weeks. Yes, I am sure & even if I am bigger, I am not concerned. The abdomen size during pregnancy has nothing to do with the size of the baby (obviously, I want it be less than 9 pounds). This is also my 3rd baby so my abdominal muscles are probably not as strong as they used to be.
I had my dental cleaning this week & my pregnancy gingivitis is back, so I will be getting cleanings every 4 instead of every 6 months again. For now it's a lot of flossing, brushing & my faithful CariFree Maintenance Rinse. Amazingly, my platelets have been normal this time around. They've stayed in 150s range (normal range is 150-400K) & even increased slightly at the last blood test. I've cut back on my work quite a bit - maybe less stress equals better platelets?

I can still give Sophia a ride on a swing...

...and my belly is never too big to snuggle!

I must have started my nesting early because ever since my 2-week vacation I've been in constant cleaning & organizing mood. It's hard to believe how much I was able to accomplish during my "staycation." I went through all of kids clothes, washed it, took the stains out & organized it by size. I took all of the clothes the kids have outgrown out of their closets & replaced it with clothes that fits. Shon & I bought a King-size bed (off Craig's list) & a new mattress for his bedroom. I will probably sleep there when the baby comes.

Kids having fun on our old mattress

I deweeded most of the garden & started to apply bark dust in places that needed it. I went through all of kids' toys & donated the ones they didn't like anymore to GoodWill. I also went through my pantry & medicine cabinet & threw away all of the expired food & medications. Our old fridge was leaking water for several months so we bought a new one. We've donated the old fridge to the Puget Sound Recycling Program, but I spent 2 days cleaning it first. Both of the dogs got grooomed & Maxie got his teeth cleaned. I ironed a huge pile of clothes that was stored in my linen closet. I am probably forgetting something, but you get the picture... It will only get harder the bigger I get, so I am trying to cross as many things off my list as possible.

Of course, I have to write an update about the kids (it's not all about this pregnancy :-)). Gerritt is officially potty-trained!!! I can't tell the exact date it happened since it was such a gradual progression over several months. He has been responsible for his own elimination for at least past 6 weeks. And I was so afraid he'd still wear diapers on his 4th birthday... He pees & poos in the regular toilet now, so no more cleaning messy potty. :-) He hasn't transitioned to his toddler bed yet, probably because I don't really care. It will probably become more of an issue when the baby comes. Gerritt still loves reading & his most recent favorite books are Fred and Ted's Road Trip by Peter Eastman, Seven Spunky Monkeys by J. F. Koller, & Wow! Said the Owl by Tim Hopgood. He is such a lovebug & tells me he loves me several times a day. Gerritt now loves TV show Blue's Clues & has to watch it every day. Also he is into anything related to Spiderman.

Sophia is upset

Sophia all grown up

Sophia is a tech wizzard. She uses the Android tablet with ease & can watch movies on Netflix, play educational games & even have stories read to her by a computer. She is not showing any interest in potty training yet, however, she tells us when she goes poo-poo in her diaper right away. Also, she can't stand the diaper wetness so she often undresses herself. She is definitely in her Mommy phase. Some days only I can dress, feed or change her diaper. Even though Shon is next to her crib when she goes to sleep, Sophia often calls me until I return & give her a backrub while singing a lullaby softly. Sophia is in love with anything Dora the Explorer.

Brother-sister love

Despite of the multiple house projects I had going on, the kids & I were able to get away to the Vasa Park Resort for some water fun & to the Larson Lake Blueberry Farm for U-pick berries.

Feeding the ducks at the Vasa Park Resort

The Farm

Blueberries

Gerritt picking blueberries

I haven't written my birth plan or done any other birth preparation (e.g., hypnobirthing CDs). I am waiting for my repeat ultrasound on September 1st to know for sure whether my placenta previa has resolved. That will determine what kind of plan I can write (homebirth vs. C-section). The only thing I did was to arrange my doula meeting in a few weeks. Of course, I won't need her if the plan is C-section, God forbid. We haven't come up with the baby's name yet; nothing sounds quite right. I am having a consultation with an OB/GYN re: risks/benefits of VBAC per my midwife preference. I've had one when pregnant with Sophia & it's just another formality. I will probably get more busy as my due date approaches. So far I am grateful for a cool summer making this pregnancy easier.

Making it through pregnancy that's not your first

2011-08-14T11:47:00.000-07:00

With the troublemakers (24.5 weeks along)

I took a long walk with the dogs yesterday & silently congratulated myself on making it this far in my pregnancy. It's not like I have a choice (once you sign up for this adventure, there is no turning back), but I felt proud of being able to take care of myself allowing me to feel relatively well. My thoughts slowly drifted back to my first pregnancy, when I had ample time to take unlimited naps & sleep in in the mornings, read pregnancy & birth-related books & shop for the baby items I thought I needed. Fast forward 4 years & now I am pregnant with my 3rd (gasp!) child. So how do I take care of myself & this unborn baby while juggling family, career & the needs of 2 toddlers?

1) Nutrition is of paramount importance. My daily protein intake goal is 80-100 grams & I include protein in every meal. Since I can't eat as much as I used to in one sitting, I eat all of my protein first, then vegetables, then everything else if I have any room left. To feel my best, I need to eat at least every 3 hours. Some of my favorite snacks are sliced apples/pears with a slice of full-fat cheese, peanuts, whole-wheat toast/English muffin with walnut butter & honey, low-fat cottage cheese with berries, & a couple of ground turkey patties with whole-wheat crackers. Make sure to feed yourself first thing in the morning before taking care of the kids or starting any chores.

2) Adequate rest is 2nd on my list. In my non-pregnant state, I usually need at least 8 hours of uninterrupted sleep per night. When pregnant, I feel much better after sleeping for 9. Thanks to cosleeping with Gerritt (he won't go to bed without me), I am in bed at 9:30 or 10 pm on most days of the week. Some days (like during the baby's growth spurts) I need more than 9 hours of sleep, so if it happened to be my day off, I nap with the kids.

3) I would not have the energy I have without regular aerobic exercise. Since we have 2 dogs that need regular walking, it also happened to be my favorite form of exercise. I must admit it's challenging to find time to exercise with my busy schedule, but one must make it a priority. I have exercised at 6 am while my husband was showering & getting ready for work, at my lunch hour & at 9 pm at night when it's dark outside because on some days those were the only times available. My goal is to walk briskly for at least 20 minutes at a time once or twice daily. I don't overexert myself, but strive to increase my heart rate & have mild perspiration by the end of my walks. Exercise is a great stress reliever & helps with pregnancy-related insomnia (you know the kind I am talking about - you can't get comfortable in any position). It's also a good way to clear your head. I often come up with really good ideas by the end of my walks.

A cup of tea - a nice way to take a break if you only have a few minutes to spare

4) It's wise not to overcommit to social engagements. Friends with older children or without children usually don't remember or understand how much energy growing a human being requires. No, I can't go out on Friday evening after working the previous 4 days or stay up past 10 pm, unless you are willing to come over & babysit the kids, feed them dinner, give them a bath & put all of the mess away to get ready for the next day, so I could still go to bed on time. Yes, it would be fun to go to ________ festival, but it would not hurt us to skip it this year. Not only will I not miss the crowds, but also all of the packing/unpacking required for such an outing to be successful (drinks, snacks, stroller, a change of clothes, diapers, wipes, favorite toys, etc.).

5) Break big housework projects into smaller ones. With every pregnancy the list of things I want to accomplish before the baby comes is a mile long. I usually don't like to leave a project unfinished once I start it, but being pregnant requires a different approach. For example, I have a huge pile of clothes for ironing, but some days I can only iron 5 shirts. Also, I can't spend 2 hours on gardening, & doing it for only 30" is OK. Maybe I can organize only 1 closet every couple of days instead of doing them all in one day. The work still gets done & I don't exhaust myself doing it.

6) Next, having time to yourself can't be overrated. Some people get more energetic the more people they have around them. It's the opposite for me. Having a few hours to myself a couple of times a week, when I am not constantly touched or have my name called every 20 minutes to solve various problems, makes me a happier person & mother. My husband has been instrumental in this initiative, taking both of the kids to his Mom's house for the day or with an overnight trip once every couple of weeks. Also, I recently found a wonderful Russian nanny my kids adore not far from our house & drop them off at her place for 4-hour blocks when I need a break (our regular nanny prefers to work full days). I don't really have "Mommy guilt" since the nanny takes them to the park as well as does various fun projects. For example, Gerritt came home last week knowing how to add simple numbers (!).

7) Teach your older kids to be self-sufficient. Encourage them to do as much for themselves as developmentally possible. For example, Gerritt can pick out his own clothes & dress himself in the morning, put Sophia's dirty diaper in the trash & clean up toys.

8) Last, but not least, letting go of my perfectionist attitude has been helpful. It's OK if the kids eat pizza for dinner instead of a homemade meal once a week. Also, bathing them once every 3-4 days instead of daily is OK too.

Everyone has to work together for the good of the family. The goal is to have a healthy mother & a healthy full-term baby. It is worth it in the long haul.

Homemade Copper River Lox

2011-08-14T11:16:00.000-07:00

I made this recipe earlier in my pregnancy, at the height of my salt/sour cravings. For a few weeks we had an abundance of the Copper River wild salmon in stores available & I wanted to try a different way of serving this delicious fish. For those of you not from the Northwest, Copper River salmon comes to us from Alaska for a few short weeks every spring & is a prized delicacy. It is bright orange in color with extra omega-3 fat deposits, making it rich & moist. In fact, I usually buy 4-5 large Copper River salmon, cut them up into steaks & freeze them using my Seal-a-Meal Vacuum to be used throughout the year. This cured salmon, or lox, may be served with baked or mashed potatoes, rice, pasta, or on top of crackers/toast. I've adapted the recipe from the book A Taste of Russia by Darra Goldstein, but changed it slightly.

Ingredients:

2 lbs of raw Copper River wild salmon, sliced into 1/2-inch steaks
1/4 cups kosher salt
2-3 large cloves of garlic, minced
1 large onion, sliced & separated into rings
3 bay leaves
1 Tbsp whole black peppercorns
1/2 tsp mustard seed
1 cup extra virgin olive oil
1/2 cup white wine vinegar

Sprinkle salmon with the mixture of salt & mustard seed. In a large glass jar or metal bowl pack salmon alternating layers of fish, onion rings, peppercorns & bay leaf.
In a small bowl mix together the olive oil, vinegar & garlic. Pour the dressing over the salmon layers. Cover the salmon with plastic wrap or ceramic plate. Place a heavy weight on top of the plate. Refrigerate salmon for 3 days before serving.

Yield: 10-12 appetizer servings

Delicious! I now prefer this salmon recipe to having it baked or grilled. Enjoy!

22 weeks

2011-07-22T17:16:00.001-07:00

23 weeks 5 days

Today is the 5th day of my official "vacation." I put vacation in quotes because unless you are on an out-of-town trip by yourself, you don't get a vacation from your home life. What I meant by "vacation" was temporary freedom from my paid responsibilities outside of home which is good enough for me. This week the kids & I have enjoyed grandma Chris & grandpa Gerry's visit from Wenatchee. I also carved out some time for trips to Value Village & Target for a few overdue purchases, house cleaning & trying new recipes.

Green Lake

This morning I had an ambitious plan to walk around Green Lake (it's a beautiful waterfront walk that usually takes 30-45" depending on one's speed). I regretted it as soon as we got out of the car. First of all, it took forever to find parking. Then the playground was overcrowded, teeming with too many kids & parents. As I watched Sophia head out in one direction & Gerritt in another, my panic mode set in. Gerritt started crying as one girl didn't want to share a playground toy, "No, it's mine!" Then Sophia almost got knocked down by older kids playing chase at the top of the tall play structure. It was annoying to constantly bump in strollers & other people & their kids. It was around noon, the blazing sun was hot & there was not a hint of shade anywhere. I finally convinced the kids to sit in the stroller in order to walk around the lake, however, I quickly realized I was running out of energy. I've decided to stop my walk while it was still enjoyable by turning around after walking about 1/3 of the loop. It took me forever to get out of my parking spot as people parked too closely in front & behind my car. The car was hot as our air conditioner broke this spring. Red & sweaty we were finally back to our cool & comfortable home (thanks to shade from multiple large trees growing nearby). I learned a valuable lesson - at 22 weeks of pregnancy it's time to scale back on long outdoor & social outings. From now on we'll stick to activities close to home or even in our back yard.
My pregnancy is in full swing. I haven't been sleeping well for past couple of weeks. I get too hot with Gerritt & 2 dogs in my bed. Also my bladder is unable to hold all night like it used to. I can't seem to get quite comfortable & turn & toss often. I now have a constant backache - probably from lifting 2 toddlers in & out of car way too many times. My belly has grown considerably, & I am afraid to imagine how much more it will grow. My feet started to swell up occasionally (especially in hot weather), so I need to watch the time I spend standing.

Shon is grilling AGAIN to satisfy my constant hunger

Our typical summer meal

I am eating every 2-3 hours & the only substance that truly satisfies my hunger is protein (red meat, chicken, peanuts, walnut butter, cheese), so Shon has to grill something at least every couple of days. I feel great otherwise. I am probably in better shape now than I was during the past year, thanks to my walks with our dogs Sammy & Maxi twice daily (at least 30" each time) for the past 2 months. My pregnancy rhinitis is back. I have a slight nasal congestion & sneeze often. I still sleep on 2 pillows, but the pillow number usually increases the further along I get. On a "positive" note, I had to go shopping for new bras since my breast size increased from a AA to a B cup. Pregnancy is the only time I get to have a real cleavage. :-) I now have a hard time putting on my shoes & usually have to do a weird side twist so my abdomen isn't in the way. Unless I am exercising, I will wear mostly easy-to-slip-on flats for the rest of my pregnancy.
I stay positive & try to imagine my little boy's face when I'll hold him in my arms for the first time. I know it will all be worth it. I have only 4 months to go & just like with my previous pregnancies I will not remember most of the unpleasant stuff. I also focus on not wishing this pregnancy away & try to enjoy every moment & every little kick in my belly. I stil remember slight sadness when it was over all too well.

Salmon caviar on a buttered whole wheat toast

My latest food cravings include caviar (I haven't wanted it for years!) & piroshki. After sampling some salmon caviar at my friend's house, I wanted to buy some more. Luckily, one of the largest red caviar distributors in the US happens to be right here in Bellevue. Coincidentally, Awers, Inc. is a Russian-owned business.

It took a lot more work to satisfy my piroshki craving. After reading & re-reading Darra Goldstein's recipe multiple times & gathering all of the ingredients, I braved to make 2 kinds of piroshki - poppyseed & broccoli-mushroom-cheese. My Mom was never good at baking, so I was afraid I inherited her lack of baking talant. Surprisingly, piroshki turned out better than I expected, but the amount of energy it took for me to make them was too high. With hurting feet & back due to prolonged standing & slightly irritated from being interrupted by kids too many times, I finally was able to enjoy the piroshki with tea at the end of the evening. The kids were not interested in tasting them at all & Shon ate only a couple. Needless to say, I probably will not make them again for another few years.

Boehms Chocolate Factory

2011-07-11T00:00:00.001-07:00

Today we headed out to join the Day Out with Thomas. We rode the train a few weeks ago & really wanted to experience it again. Little did I know that this outing was so popular for families in the Northwest. All of the event tickets were sold out not only for this, but the next weekend as well. Apparently, the tickets go on sale in April of every year.
Luckily, we didn't have to deal with tears & whining from disappointed kids. We stayed in Snoqualmie & made the most of our afternoon. It helped to discover a cute local cafe called the Bindlestick Coffee & Beer House. The cafe was child-friendly (!) & had a variety of toys, books & puzzles available to keep the little ones busy. Gerritt enjoyed playing the Dora the Explorer memory game, doing the Hungry Caterpillar puzzle as well as Don't Break the Ice game. This game was quite a hit. Both Shon & I took turns playing with him & all of us had lots of laughs. Shon enjoyed some local beer while I sipped on a delicious cup of my favorite Two Leaves & a Bud white peony tea.

Gerritt posing with one of the statues near the factory

Shon & Sophia entering the Boehms chocolate store

Gerritt & me posing in front of the chocolates (I had to threaten him not to buy him any chocolates if he didn't try to smile for this photo)

Sampling the chocolates outside

On our way back from Snoqualmie we made a spare of the moment decision to visit the Boehms Chocolate store & factory in another cute local town Issaaquah. The factory tours were done for the day, but we got to walk around beautiful park-like grounds, admire a georgeous High Alpine Chapel (a replica of a 12th Century chapel near St. Moritz, Switzerland - a popular place for weddings), visit the factory's store & sample delicious chocolates, of course!
The Boehms Candies, Inc. was founded in 1950s by Julius Boehm of Swiss-Austrian descent. It's known for it exquisite, European-style, hand-dipped variety of chocolates. Boehms Candies even offers chocolate making classes (adults & children 8 years old & up), so another activity for us to look forward to a few years down the road. Another busy Sunday with tired but excited kids & parents!

Thrift Store Shopping

2011-07-07T01:50:00.000-07:00

Some of the my finds drying after being washed

Another good find - 2 kids' folding chairs for $8!

A pretty collection of vases

Recently I posted how much I enjoyed shopping & saving money at Value Village (a local thrift store) as a status update in my Facebook profile. Little did I know, the posting would upset my husband. Apparently, some people find it degrading & embarrassing to shop at Value Village or GoodWill. I've met this attitude before from a "typical" middle-class American. She was elaborating how proud she was of her niece going to school during the week & working as a waitress on the weekends. The money made working weekends was not used to pay off student loans or build a savings account. No, no. It was mostly to afford buying DESIGNER CLOTHES. When I suggested a thrift store, I got a reply, "Oh, she would never go to a place like that."
After finding a designer outfit & a pair of shoes in Value Village more than once for just under $15 I can never justify paying a full retail price again. You can say, I am addicted to thrift shopping. I find it thrilling going to the store not knowing what you will discover & how much money you can save. It is like a treasure hunt! Although I would not buy underwear, socks or a mattress/pillows from a thrift store, it is my favorite place to buy kids' clothes, kitchen items, toys & clothes for myself. I especially loved buying my maternity clothes there. Most American women (who usually have 1-2 kids) wear it for relatively brief period of time & then give it away to a thrift store in excellent condition. Knowing how pricey maternity clothes can be, I can't imagine a different place to shop. The same goes for kids't clothes & shoes. Children often go through growth spurts & hardly wear out their clothes during that time.
I admit, initially I went to Value Village to save money. But as I learned more about this organization, I also discovered I was contributing to the good in the world by conserving natural resources, eliminating waste & helping others. Value Village's recycling program eliminates more than 500 million pounds of waste from our landfills each year. Also, some of the recycled clothes & household items are sent to the developing countries. So I will continue to be a proud Value Village shopper. Every time Gerritt asks me whether we can shop at Value Village again, it is music to my ears!

It's a boy!

2011-07-05T22:42:00.001-07:00

20 weeks pregnant

Excited family awaiting the ultrasound results

Today we went for our 1st "real" prenatal ultrasound. It was scheduled for 9 am & Shon's Mom spent previous night at our house so she would not miss this important milestone. Shon took morning off work, & even Gerritt & Sophia were there to share the moment. Thankfully, Sophia fell asleep in the car & continued to sleep all through our appointment. Gerritt was very curious, but observed quietly in his chair.
We waited patiently as the ultrasound tech scanned my belly to check & measure all of the baby's important structures. She saved the best for last, "Do you guys want to find out the baby's sex?" A few long seconds later she announced, "It's a boy!" I was so convinced it was a girl, that it took me a few moments to absorb the news. Shon & his Mom looked happy, & Gerritt was too busy playing with his chair to react. The perinatologist came in at the end of the visit & repeated parts of the scan herself, "Yep, it's definitely a boy." The thought about our ultrasound tech possibly making a mistake crossed my mind, so I needed to hear that I was carrying a baby boy from someone else.
Unfortunately, every time you do an ultrasound, you are likely to find something concerning. There was an MRI involved to make sure my placenta was not too close to the C-section scar when I was pregnant with Sophia. This time I have placenta previa - a condition in which placenta covers the opening to the cervix. I was reassured by the perinatologist & my midwife that there was about 75% chance that the placenta will move away from the cervix as my uterus grows. So a repeat ultrasound for me in 2 months. I will try not to worry in the meantime.

Our little boy - 20 weeks

The little peanut's 3D image

Ultrasound findings aside, I am pleasantly surprised! Boys don't really run on my side of the family, so I am still getting used to the prospect of having another one around the house. Shon breathed a sigh of relief, "Now we only have to pay for one wedding." :-) Although I would have been happy to have another girl, I felt slightly relieved too. Having raised one of each sexes up to this point, I found out that there are some definite differences. Sophia keeps us way more busy than Gerritt ever did. She is louder, more persistent in getting her own way & very mischievous. She keeps us all on our toes! There is no guarantee Sophia's new brother will have Gerritt's personality, but at least I can hope.
Of course, I called to share the happy news with my Mom & Dad in Russia as well as Chris & Gerry. My Mom was just delighted & said she already knew it was going to be a boy just like Shon's Mom did. Apparently, my motherly intuition is not as well developed.
I am 20 weeks along today & already halfway through my pregnancy. Where did the time go? My 1st pregnancy seemed to go on forever, but now I am too busy with my day-to-day life to really pay much attention. My midwife suggested I start baby movement counting recently, & I just laughed. It's so rare for me to have quiet moments to myself.
I can't wait to hold the little guy in my arms! When most people are eating turkey on Thanksgiving Day, hopefully, I will be getting to know my new son & recovering from birth. And best present of all - he'll definitely be here for next Christmas!

Bellevue Strawberry Festival

2011-06-29T12:44:00.000-07:00

It was another busy weekend for us. After cold & rainy June, summer has finally arrived! After working for most of the week, I really wanted to spend time with my family doing something fun. As long as we get out of the house by 11 am to do something it's good enough for me. As usual, I probably did too much, but went to work on Tuesday morning happy & relaxed.
On Saturday Shon had to interview a few people for our rental property in University Place. I convinced him to take Sophia to grandma's house on his way there, so Gerritt & I could have more flexibility in our day. With Sophia gone, Gerritt & I made a spare-of-the-moment decision to go see the newly released Cars-2 movie. Just like the 1st one, Cars-2 didn't disappoint & we were on the edge of our seats the whole time.

Gerritt & his doggie posing at the entrance to the Festival

Gerritt & Sophia playing with the water pump (one of the antique tools from the Eastside Heritage Center)

A funny clown who made balloon animals for both of the kids

Gerritt's sword

Kids jumping in the bouncy house

Gerritt's first time getting an airbrush face painting

No surprise there - he picked a bat picture

Last photo before leaving

On Sunday morning, we all headed out to the annual Strawberry Festival. This festival has been been occurring since 1925 to originally honor Bellevue's bountiful strawberry crops. Nowadays, the Strawberry Festival is the Eastside Heritage Center's Signature Event, celebrating the region's agricultural heritage as well as it's diverse cultural past, present & future.
The kids had a blast eating ice-cream, receiving balloon animals from a clown, jumping in giant inflatable Carnival Bouncer, Obstacle Course & Super Castle, & playing with an old-fashioned water pump from the Heritage Center. Gerritt even got his first face painting. Of course, he recognized the superhero action figure Batman's logo bat right away & chose to have it painted on both of his cheeks.

Sophia riding the tractor

A picnic outside

A beautiful rose garden at the Woodland Park Zoo

A variety of roses in the garden

On Monday Shon went to work while Sophia, Gerritt & I visited the Woodland Park Zoo again. We even bought an annual membership since we go there so often. We've decided to deviate from our usual routine & after riding the Historical Carousel, had a relaxing picnic outside. We finished our outing with going to the Woodland Park Rose Garden. After almost loosing my mind trying to keep the kids away from the big fountain in the garden (Sophia almost fell into it), I buckled them into the stroller & was finally able to enjoy viewing & photographing beautiful roses. What a nice finish to my 3-day weekend!

Our 6-year wedding anniversary

2011-06-19T21:46:00.001-07:00

At the EMP Museum

One of Jimmi Hendrix's stage outfits

Last Saturday we've celebrated our 6-year wedding anniversary. 6 years seems like a relatively short time, but it feels like we've been together forever. Our marriage has been productive & fruitful one as well. We've become a busy household with 2 dogs, 2 kids & another one on the way. :-)
To celebrate this special occasion, we wanted to go out somewhere special without the kids. So we hired our nanny Irina for the whole Sunday & headed out. We didn't have a solid plan since it was a cloudy & rainy day & this was one of the few times we could allow ourselves to be spontaneous.
First, we had a dim sum at the Jade Garden in Chinatown. Unfortunately, our outing coincided with Father's Day, so we've waited for over 1 hour to be seated. Nevertheless, the meal was delicious & well worth the wait. Since I've never been to the EMP (Experience Music Project) Museum, we went there next. The museum happened to host the Avatar exhibit, movie I enjoyed seeing, so we toured this exhibit along with learning more about the origins of the Nirvana & Jimi Hendrix. I wish we had more genuine interest in the Guitar Gallery, but we checked it out too. We finished the day with having some quiet time & reading newspapers at one of the coffee shops next to the KOMO 4 news station.

The famous guitar sculpture

One of the art models from the movie Avatar

We did what we were supposed to do - have a date without the kids. Only later that evening, while pushing the stroller with Gerritt & Sophia during a walk with our dogs Sammy & Max, we realized we were the happiest being all together as a family. Just like our get away to Portland, a day full of seemingly exciting activities didn't bring us as much joy as seeing our kids' happy faces. Shon & I are definitely home buddies. Our life may not seem that exciting to some couples but what matters is that we are on the same page. We have eHarmony to thank & perhaps destiny?

17 weeks

2011-06-17T07:44:00.001-07:00

This pregnancy is going by so fast. I can't believe I am almost to the halfway point! Thankfully, my nausea subsided at about 15 weeks & I've started to feel normal again. I didn't expect it to last as long as it did, but I trusted the process. I've started to show & many people have been asking me when I am due. I couldn't get away with unbuttoned pants anymore & had to get out my maternity clothes from storage in the garage. Some definite changes took place in my pelvis as suddenly my back & pubic bones became sore. All I did to fix that was to ensure getting at least two 20-minute walks every day. I now can't simply jump out of bed in the mornings, but have to slowly roll onto my side first & then get up to prevent a nasty abdominal muscle cramp.
We've decided to do a quad blood screening test at 16 weeks & it came back normal. The best part about entering the 2nd trimester was to finally feel the baby move! It happened at around 15 weeks & I was experienced enough to know it wasn't a muscle twitch or gas bubbles. Now the baby moves all the time & even surprises me at times (especially when I am sitting at a meeting at work & expect it the least). We were going to wait until birth to find out the baby's sex, but we can hardly wait. So we are doing a complete OB ultrasound on July 5th. I have a feeling it's a little girl (maybe because I want Sophia to have a sister?) & I'll be really surprised if it's a boy. I am counting the days!
Shon at first was ambivalent about me having a home birth, but he's slowly getting used to the idea. He even bought me the La Bassine birthing pool & a home birth midwife kit through an ad he saw at work. He did it just in time as the FDA has been seizing all birth pool inventory as unregistered medical equipment. The traditional medical establishment has always classified home birth as dangerous & try to interfere in any way they can. Crazy!
My midwife gave me a mixture of dry herbs to drink daily for the rest of my pregnancy. I had ITP, or idiopathic thrombocytopenia purpura, with both of my pregnancies. In lay terms, it means my platelet number decreases & the cause is unknown. When platelets drop too low, it may cause hard-to-control post-partum hemorrhage. So needless to say, if I hope to have my dream home birth, my platelets must stay in a healthy range. My midwife advised drinking a nettle tea for this purpose. However, the herbal pregnancy blend I received from her also included red raspberry leaf, alfalfa & oatstraw.

Nettle is a powerful adrenal tonic & improves immune system function. It reduces anemia, increases muscle response time & reduces incidences of post-partum hemorrhage. It also improves skin elasticity thus preventing vaginal tissue tearing during birth & helps to relieve water retention & promotes breast milk production.

Red raspberry leaf tones smooth muscles in the body & improves contractibility of uterus. It nourishes the ovaries & reduces morning sickness & intestinal discomfort caused by excessive progesterone.

Alfalfa is a restorative tonic & promotes pituitary gland function. It contains enzymes which enable food to be assimilated properly & has antifungal properties.

Oatstraw is rich in calcium & improves muscle tone throughout the body, reducing leg cramps & improving digestion. Improved muscle tone allows the cardiovascular system to function more vigorously improving circulation to the uterus & placenta. Oatstraw is invaluable in building bones & tooth enamel.

Rosemary Gladstar's Family Herbal - A Guide to Living Life with Energy, Health & Vitality is one of my favorite herbal guides & a good place to start for someone desiring to learn more about using herbs.

Camping in Sophia's crib

Snuggling on the couch

Many changes are happening with Gerritt & Sophia as well. Gerritt understands that there is a baby in my belly, but not Sophia. They've become really close & it warms my heart. They can easily entertain each other & need me less. Sophia is going through language explosion & speaks in 5 to 6-word sentences, so I can often hear them talking back & forth. She can already sing the ABC song from the beginning to end. Sophia follows Gerritt everywhere & he's happy to share, most of the time. Their favorite thing to do is hiding under the covers & playing with the android tablet. Gerritt uses it to play all kinds of educational games & watch fairy tales, & Sophia enjoys just sitting next to him & observing. Amazingly, Gerritt mastered all of the tablet's buttons & can perform many functions with ease (just like he can now use the TV remote control almost independently - not that it's a good thing. I am still in charge of how much TV he can watch daily).

Siblings who potty train together, stay together?

Playing games under the covers

Gerritt looks more like me where Sophia looks more like Shon. Actually, Gerritt really takes after my father. He has full lips & a high forehead. Many of Gerritt's facial expressions I've seen many times while growing up - they are just like my Dad's! Gerritt & I are also very similar in personality. I wouldn't say he is my favorite child (I find something unique & special about each one of my kids), but it's easier for Gerritt & I to get along since we are so much alike.
Sophia amazes me with her strength & perseverance. She has become VERY independent & refuses any help with most of the tasks. For example, unbuttoning & taking off her coat, taking off her pants & diaper to sit on the potty chair, eating (I can only sit patiently & watch while she drops half of her meal on the floor while trying to use her fork/spoon), undressing before taking a bath, etc. If one of us attempts to sing along while she recites her ABC song, she gets upset & then starts over, "Let me do it!" She has recently began to take off her wet & dirty diapers, so we've had several unpleasant instances of cleaning up poop from her crib, the living room carpet & couch. When Sophia takes her nap, her nanny or I have to check her hourly to make sure she doesn't wake up, poop, & then undress herself (she can do all this in complete silence, I must add - I've learned it the hard way). Sophia can even climb out of her crib now. I found her on Shon's bed bext to the crib twice over the past month. She is definitely a little troublemaker & a handful - more so than Gerritt was at this age. :-)

Gerritt taking his puppy for a walk

Gerritt is in his Curious George phase now & one of his favorite books is Curious George Goes to a Chocolate Factory by Margret & H. A. Rey's. He even requested to visit a real chocolate factory & I found our local Theo Chocolate Factory available for tours. However, the factory has loud & hot equipment & tours are not advised for kids younger than 7. Gerritt's other favorite book this week was Big Bug Surprise by Julia Gran. Thanks to reading it, we learned that insects always have 6 legs, but spiders have 8; dragonflies are the fastest insects; & bees can't see someone covered in white & they don't sting what they don't see.

Some of the amazing photos I can take with my camera!

Unfortunately, we had a tragic event happen on Memorial Day. Our beloved toy poodle Spike was hit by a car & died 2 days later despite best medical interventions. The whole thing happened in a split second while Shon was getting the kids out of the car. We were so depressed & heartbroken it was difficult to function. The house became unbearably quiet & our whole family felt the loss of Spike acutely. We've always been dog people & loosing Spike was as painful as loosing a family member. Dogs bring such positive & vibrant energy into the house, we simply couldn't imagine not having one. Our friends felt sorry for us & gave us one of their two Maltese dogs to help us heal emotinally over the next few weeks. Little did we know that they were also looking to adopt Sammy out, so after a week they just offered us to keep him forever. Sammy has been with us for a little over 2 weeks now & he is a joy to have around.

Thanks to him, I have an exercise buddy again & have been walking every morning & night for the past 2 weeks! While Spike had clear preference for Shon, Sammy loves me more than anyone in the family. So he follows me everywhere & even sleeps next to Gerritt & I. Shon misses sleeping next to a dog, so he's been alternating between bringing home Dingo & John from his Mom's house. We have a house full of dogs again!

The Northwest Railway Museum

2011-06-12T17:31:00.001-07:00

At the train station

Kisses!

A few weeks ago we were looking for a unique & family-friendly outing & had the most delightful day trip to a little town of Snoqualmie. We had the pleasure of discovering the Northwest Railway Museum as well as taking a 75-minute train excursion. The Snoqualmie Depot was originally constructed in 1890 & has been restored in 1981. All of the train coaches are authentic & historically accurate with limited doorway widths & steep stairwells.

Waiting to board the train

"Your tickets, please!"

Gerritt & Sophia absolutely loved the train ride. We haven't seen them so excited in a while. Gerritt especially enjoyed the whole experience of buying the train tickets, giving them to the train master, climbing aboard & observing the view from the train window. The train went all the way to famous Snoqualmie Falls & we were able to savour the most breathtaking view.

Sophia showing her belly button

Looking out of the train windows

Gerritt has been in love with the trains ever since watching Thomas the Engine cartoons. Although I rode trains regularly while growing up in Russia, it's more rare for kids in the US. Riding a real train provided a different & exciting adventure for all of us. We also enjoyed participating in an activity that the whole family could share.

The Snoqualmie Depot

The magnificent view from the train

After the train ride, we took a short walking tour to see all of the different trains on the exhibit at the Museum. Gerritt & Sophia even climbed some of them. Sophia absolutely refused to be left behind & had no problems keeping up with her older brother.

Sophia attempting to run away, again...

Trying to share the driver's seat

A beautiful park near the train station

We finished our afternoon by exploring a beautiful river park nearby. Tired, but satisfied we drove home. Apparently trains, sunshine & fresh air were just what we needed this weekend!

Eggs, eggs & more eggs!

2011-06-07T16:06:00.000-07:00

This post should have been written in April right after our Easter celebration, but like so many other things it had to wait until I had time & the right mood to sit down, organize the photos as well as my thoughts. But better late than never, so here it goes...

Our Easter-themed chandelier decorations

Our Easter celebration this year turned out to be more elaborate than the one last year. I've started preparations at least a month in advance (bought the decorative eggs & the bunny ears as well as egg coloring).

Gerritt all dressed up with Easter baskets

Both of the kids were old enough to participate in an outdoor Easter egg hunt, which we did at the Vasa Park Resort.

In anticipation of the Easter egg hunt

Daddy & Sophia

Gerritt hunting for the Easter eggs

We probably enjoyed the egg hunt as much as the kids (not the aggressive parents though - some of them were egg hunting with their kids even though the signs clearly stated no parents were allowed on the fields ;-( ). Gerritt did very well despite the egg hunting field being literally packed with other kids some of whom were pretty pushy.

Sophia barely needed any help from Daddy

Sophia figured out what to do right away & barely needed any help from Shon.

Sorting the goods

Most of the colorful plastic eggs were filled with chocolates & candy. Some of the eggs had small papers with numbers on them inside. At the end of the day each paper was traded for a toy prize.

Gerritt absolutely loved the Easter Bunny! After posing for photos, he went back to him not once but twice - to hug him, sit on his lap & give him a few high fives. :-)

Gerritt with the Easter Bunny

The kids & I

First tulip of the spring

Gerritt coloring eggs

After all of the morning activities, Sophia took a nap. Gerritt & I used this time as an opportunity to color the Easter eggs. I told him ahead we were going to do the egg coloring in the afternoon & of course, he was way too excited to nap.

Sophia's Easter photo

Gerritt posing for camera

The Easter eggs & Russian Easter bread

In the evening, the kids enjoyed sampling the Easter eggs as well as the traditional Russian Easter bread - "kulich." Kulich is fluffy & light sweet bread with raisins which is usually served side by side with cream cheese like dessert paste - "paskha." Kulich is something I grew up with in Russia. Serving it for Easter was a perfect opportunity to introduce some of the Russian traditions to our Russian-Korean family. At the end the Easter celebration was a bit exhausting, but as usual, I am glad we did it!

Tangy Herb New Potato Salad

2011-06-07T15:16:00.000-07:00

This recipe was inspired by our recent trip to the Redmond Farmer's Market & seeing the farmers selling lots of new potatoes. This salad is seasoned with lemon juice & fresh herbs & is full of flavor. It's a perfect addition to any barbeque this summer.

Ingredients:

3 lbs new potatoes, with skins on, washed & scrubbed
1 1/4 cup Vegenaise (if allergic to eggs/dairy) or Italian-style salad dressing
1/4 cup chopped green onions
2 celery stalks, chopped
1/4 cup chopped dill pickles (may also substitute with chopped pickled olives or capers)
2 Tbsp chopped fresh dill
2 Tbsp chopped fresh cilantro or parsley
2 Tbsp chopped fresh basil
2-3 Tbsp of fresh-squeezed lemon juice
1 Tbsp of Dijon mustard
Black pepper & salt to taste

1) Cover potatoes with water in a large pot. Salt water to taste. Bring water to a boil. Cook for 10-20," depending on potato size (potatoes should not be falling apart, but cooked al dente). Drain & set aside to cool.

2) Meanwhile, stir together Vegenaise, lemon juice, Dijon mustard & pepper/salt. Dice the potatoes. While the potatoes are still warm, but not hot, pour the dressing over them. Add the green onions, dill, cilantro, basil & pickles. Mix until potatoes are well coated. For best flavor, refrigerate for 1-2 hours prior to serving.

P. S. According to the Environmental Working Group, potatoes belong to the "Dirty Dozen," a list of fruits & vegetables that consistently have the highest pesticide levels. It makes sense to choose organic over conventionally grown potatoes whenever possible.

Gerritt & Sophia on the way back from the Farmer's Market

Sophia posing for Mommy

Our get away trip

2011-05-21T08:01:00.000-07:00

Yesterday Shon & I traveled to Portland for our 1st romantic get away I don't know in how long. When Gerritt was born in 2007, we were pretty much tied to the house (just think of the packing nightmare - formula, bottles, clean filtered water, diapers, wipes, car seat, clothes, baby food, toys, etc). Then Sophia came along when Gerritt was just 19 months old & were were stationed home again. It has been more than 3.5 years since Shon & I had an out-of-town get away without the kids.
At my last prenatal visit, I had a long conversation with my wonderful midwife about the quality of life, taking the time to recharge & investing in my marriage. She noticed how run down & tired I was so her suggestions included regular date nights & get aways with my husband, cutting back on my work schedule (especially, stressful hospital shifts) & even quitting the hospital all together, & getting Gerritt out of my bed & sharing it with Shon instead. Interestingly enough, she sensed my strong need for independence & really encouraged me to depend more on him emotionally & financially. She emphasized that growing human beings is an important & time-consuming job & there's nothing wrong with relying on my husband more. She was so right about that. I always prided myself in having my own money (my hourly wage is actually higher than Shon's) & not having to ask for anything. But... working 4-5 days a week with 3 kids under the age of 5 will definitely be too much for me, especially with my all-giving, attachment style of mothering.
So a few weeks ago Shon & I planned our 3-day trip. First, it was going to be Victoria, Canada (it was our last romantic trip in April of 2005, right before our wedding), but then we've decided on Portland, Oregon instead. We just couldn't see ourselves spending almost a day on travel, plus the dollar doesn't buy you as much as it used to in Canada. We were able to book our 4-star hotel Monaco in downtown Portland using priceline.com for only $80/night. We had to pay $20 in hotel fees & $33/night for parking, but it was still a great deal.
First, we dropped off the kids at Korean grandma's house on Friday morning. I've been talking about Mommy & Daddy's trip to Gerritt for a few days prior to our departure. Still, he became very needy on Friday morning, pulling all the stops. He constantly asked, "Are you leaving now, Mommy?" He also kept saying he wanted to come with us. I had a hard time getting dressed because he would hug my legs & say, "I love you, Mommy!" He also announced, "I don't think you should go on your trip today, Mommy. You should go tomorrow instead." Sophia fell asleep in the car on the way to grandma's house, so after transferring her to bed, we didn't have to say goodbye. Gerritt, however, started crying right after we kissed him goodbye. He was in the middle of watching his monster truck show & we hoped we would be spared the tears. Instead of prolonging the agony & returning to comfort him, we just said we'd be back soon & headed out.
As we drove off in our car, an overwhelming feeling of relief & freedom set in. We even did a high five to each other. Shon actually had a harder time leaving than I did, "Don't you feel guilty?," "Maybe we should take him with us?" Although I've contemplated it multiple times, my answer was a firm "no." Not only would we have to pack a completely different set of things for Gerritt, but the whole trip would be about him & his schedule: "Mommy, I need to go potty," "Mommy, I am hungry," "Mommy, I am tired," etc.

Our lovely Hotel Monaco

We spent both of our mornings in Portland sleeping in & I even took a long nap in each of the afternoons. We were able to stay in the hypoallergenic room which means no smoking, non-down pillows & comforters, only "green" cleaning products, HEPA room air filters & glutein-free snacks. So, thankfully, we didn't have to put up with strange hotel smells, runny noses & watery, puffy eyes in the mornings.
We did much downtown exploring & some shopping at the Pionner Square. We also enjoyed fine dining at the Portland Prime restaurant & the Southpark Seafood Grill & Wine Bar. Mother's Bistro & Bar had the most delicious breakfast food. This restaurant even has its own cookbook, which I ordered on amazon.com. We had fun at the Portland Saturday Market where I bought a pair of beautiful handmade earrings. On the evening prior to our departure we watched the movie Thor.
We tried to restrain ourselves & call to check on the kids only once a day in the evenings. Gerritt was a good boy (except he refused to eat most of grandma's cooking), but Sophia was more work. She woke up at 3 am, undressed herself, then peed all over her bed (she does that sometimes, especially if she is wearing a one-piece zip up pajamas).
All good things must come to an end. Our get away trip was good, but I would have probably been ok with just one night at a hotel. It was hard to watch other people's kids & not miss my own, especially on the 2nd day of our vacation. The rich restaurant food got really old & made me even more nauseated. Simply walking by the famous street food carts & getting a whiff of food would bring on a wave of nausea. I started to miss my oatmeal with raisins & rice milk, strawberry kefir, yogurt, sauteed greens, grilled turkey patties & other simple foods I eat regularly at home. We had plans to visit the Washington Park, Portland's Classical Chinese Garden, Pittock Mansion & Multnomah Falls, but I had so little energy. I usually prefer more physically active vacations, but my body craved rest & sleep. I am glad I honored that. Now just a trip to buy a couple of toy gifts for Gerritt & Sophia & we are heading back home!

13 weeks

2011-05-18T22:26:00.000-07:00

My ultrasound at 9 weeks 6 days (the embryo is about 2.8 cm long). What a relief - only one baby!

I wasn't going to do any ultrasounds at all in this pregnancy, however, I changed my mind. This time around, I had to experience something that so many pregnant women complain about - morning sickness. It wasn't just there in the mornings, but in the mid-day & evenings, & even woke me up during the night. In fact, I am still having nausea daily at 13 weeks along. I've heard that every pregnancy can be different, & the fact that I didn't have nausea in my previous pregnancies wouldn't necessarily mean that I would be spared this time. However, the thought of twins kept crossing my mind over & over. With an ultrasound machine so readily available at my work it was too tempting not to do a basic ultrasound. It showed that I had only 1 baby inside my uterus (whew!), there was a heartbeat, & a little one already had arms & legs! It was great to know I am not just sick (even though I feel that way most of the time), but I am growing a human being. Hopefully, I'll feel better in another week or so.

Oysters - a new craving this week

We've been thinking of baby names lately. It is so hard not knowing whether we are having a little girl or a boy! I wasn't going to find out the sex before my home birth (to give myself another reason to push the baby out naturally :-)), but I may have to change my mind on that too. Here are some of the names that crossed our minds in no particular order:

For a girl - Camilla, Kelly, Rose, Victoria, Alexandra, Giovanna, June, Alice, Dominique, Esme, Nina, Mila, Maria, Katya, Michelle, Kate, January, Emma

For a boy - Thomas, Alexander, Adrian, Stefan, Christian, Nicholas, Dimitri, David, William, Brock, Brice, Ryan, Cameron, Hudson, Ren, Jacob, Jason

As you can see, it's much easier to come up with a girl's name. We definitely want to avoid the top 10 name category & trendy/celebrity one too. Nothing sounds quite right yet, so we are still pondering what name would fit this child. I even listened to the Baby Names podcast from mothering.com to help me come up with baby name ideas. If we were to follow old baby naming traditions from Scotland, for example, we would name our 2nd son after my father (Yuryi) & our 2nd daughter after Shon's mother (Young). I am not too excited about those two...

Still craving pickled vegetables

I had to post this photo because the cruelest thing happened. I was so happy to find a large jar of pickled mushrooms at the Russian grocery store, but, unfortunately, I was unable to open it! Shon & I both tried to take off the darn lid using towels, rubber gloves, a jar opener & hot/cold water - all without success. My craving for something sour was so strong, I pickled my own cucumbers the same night (which is something I've NEVER done before). The pickles turned out to be a success & I had yummy crunchy cucumbers at almost every meal during the next week. :-) P. S. We were able to open the mushroom jar eventually by drilling a hole through the lid.

Despite my seeming inability to open jars, I've become a sound sleeper, almost like this jaguar from our recent trip to the zoo. :-) I can barely keep my eyes open while reading 3-4 bedtime stories to Gerritt. Once the lights are turned off, I am out in less than 5 minutes.
More updates to come!